; TH AVALANCHE OF LOVE♥

The Neverending Issue...

2011-12-08T03:44:00.005+08:00

So.... Just bcos She's your "bestfriend" "goodfriend" whatever-friend.. i cant get upset with her?...
even when she "mushy-talk"?, yeah its prolly just the way she talks to all her "bestfriends"..

'Hi___! Its your lovely pea brain here again~~ blahblahblah :DDD'

So... thats the way she talks to whoever she's Close with.. eventhough its a little "too much" to talk to an attached guy this way.. & even when she knows im already very uncomfortable with her.. along with all the other issues about her throughout this whole year... okayy mayb im taking it too hard.. still taking it too hard... making it difficult for you huh.. your "goodfriend"..

but i cant even get upset?.. i cant even complain?.. i cant even justify what i feel?.. so im wrong for even being jealous, feeling sad, getting upset? bcos Im your Girlfriend, She's your Goodfriend, .....

fine... so in whichever way.. in whoever's opinion... im not supposed to be upset with this girl there.. no matter what she says.. however uncomfortable she can make me feel.. whatever atrocious things she may do.. i have to swallow everything, and put up a smile?

even when im crying th hell outta myself, even when its a tornado inside me?..

alright then.. Anything for You honey.. alright... sorry honey..

I'm no longer your priority, am i?..

2011-10-14T15:27:00.016+08:00

---------------------------------
" The greatest gift you can give to your special someone is your TIME. It's like you're giving the portion of your life that you can never bring back."

- To You: i know you need your own time. your frens are down and so are you, you said you need to acc them.. okay..
but im down too. & yeah they'd need some company, but sure they could've done th same without you. but what about me, th only company i want is you. (even when you said you'd spare some time with me, but apparantly you broke that promise)..... maybe im too selfish... yeah whatever.. just have fun honey..
------------------------------
- how long does it take to translate some korean letter?. i spent a whole night sacrificing my sleep to search for those words. why cant you do th same. (you promised me you'd translate it within ____, you extended th date, still)... fine korean's too tedious to type out? i gave you a french one. i translated th one you gave me on th very same day. 3days after i gave it to you, yours is still untranslated. with google translator its as easy as writing abc. but instead you spent your online time on some game cheat code. -- according to "th 99 things girls shud know bout guys" posted on fb, guys treat sports n games like girls treat makeup and whatever. fine. but i dont see myself prioritising any of those stuff above you.

Alright alright take ALL the time you need for some stupid translations. The letters are only written for you, you're not eager to know what i wrote then fine with me.
-----------------------------
- why did it take so long for you to finally accept th fact that my jealousy & anger just cant be controlled. I hope you really really understand that it was truly because of you that all th "hating" began. Bcos of your non-understanding & your "defending her" & th lack of your support for me (your girlfriend, dont i get th priorty of your support to no matter what stupid nonsense im making a fuss about?...), th initialslightunhappinessbutstilljokingsituation brewed into theunreversiblemajorjealousyplusvolcanoeruption. get this into your head - GIRLS DONT NEED VALID REASONS TO GET JEALOUS & BOYFRIENDS SHOULD ALWAYS SHOW UNDERSTANDING AND SUPPORT, NOT EXPLANATIONS BCOS BY DEFENDING IT ONLY MAKES THE GIRL MORE PARANOID!

*listening to some random songs on mtv channel now, then there's the lyrics "you think you know me, thats why im leaving you lonely. Cos baby you dont know a thing about me." ohh how nice..............................

- why cant you just spend All your time with me.. give All your attention to Me even if we're in a crowd of a thusand of your frens.. talk to Only me.. think of Only me.. support Me even when im talking crap.. make Me happy when im sad.. Endure all my illogical trantrums.. Smile at me whenever you see me.. look at me without me staring at you desperately for ages just to let you know i want to talk to you or just have some reactions from you.. you seem to be in you own world when im talking to my frens beside you, bcos you dont seem to have any reactions even when im talking bout you.... guess these only existed in little girls & little boys' relationships.. i cant expect any of those from you.. cos you need your time your space and you arent as tolerant of my trantrum anymore.. so here i am, throwing all th things i've been keeping to myself for god-knows-how-long, here in my rusted-blog. hope you're enjoying yourself over there..
-------------------------------
- if you didnt give me a reason to get upset with you, would i?...
---------------------------------
- after like almost a year without blogging, im finally back... bcos i've just promised myself not to throw nonsensical tantrums on you anymore.. bcos "girls and guys just cant see things in th same way".. i cant make you understand exactly why im upset bout certain stuff.. and i cant see th rationale of your frustration on th irrelevance of my angers.. now im thinking if this would get worse... you said those arent "nonsense", but you cant understand why im upset, so doesnt that make my tantrums "nonsense". what if one day you just cant take my nonsense anymore and find me totally annoying and start ignoring me?... hence, i made this promise.. you once told me not to bottle up my unhappinness, but there's so many things that makes me unhappy and when i make my unhappiness known, you start getting all emo and all those and just cant understand my pov & keep explaining to me your pov. why dont you know that i cant see from your perspective just like you cant see from my perspective. BUT, dont keep things to yourself please...
------------------------
~ i know you'd be all defensive and start explaining and emoing and all those.. i dont want that.. i dont want to make you sad and endure my "anger problems bcos of tiny things" again.. i dont want you to get annoyed & immpatient.. if you say you're not, then try explaining why you are treating me so differently when im sad/angry compared to last time?.. at th first few months you were like "im sorry... dont angry... come on dont ignore me...):" then now its like " ugh what did i do again wth are you angry its just some unmeaningful things. ugh come on give me a break *smack your own head*". (bodylanguage, im not referring to th things you said)
-----------------------------------------------
So conclusion ; i dont ever want you to see this post bcos i dont want you to think im being unreasonable again.. i dont want to see you sad cos that would only make me feel worse.. & i'd feel guilty for even being angry at you... so no matter what unhappiness i feel, no matter how much it hurts.. i'll try my best to endure & not vent it on you..

So hey blog, i'll be back (: i wonder how long i can endure before i spill th milk on this...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
- Sorry baby, but... im just not an understanding girl anymore... ):
-----------------------------------------------------------------------

Valentines♥

2011-02-14T22:23:00.003+08:00

It's A Beautiful Day~
It's A Lovely Day~
It's A Happy Day~
It's Valentines Day~

ILY bigass VMH (:
thanks for everything♥

; confusion

2010-11-06T17:08:00.003+08:00

being in a relationship isnt always a bad thing..
nor is it always a good thing.
so just balance it up and it'll be fine.. right?

this place is so freaking dead now...

do feigning ignorance help?
is knowing everything an advantage?
is not knowing, sometimes, better?
is it better to be demanding, or forgiving?
should i be in denial, or expect every single truth?
is it th imagination, or th sense?
how can i get to know everything?
how do you know what's true and what's not?
how do i stop disturbance from interfering in me?
is confronting better than bottling them up?
how do know i know what i should do?

the world. the people. the feelings. the life.
; confusion.

Thoughts

2010-09-26T14:59:00.005+08:00

My EyeCandy- Yb;
Mayb you really are just my eyecandy..
I'll just look at you, and smile to myself..
No hard feelings..
Just remember me..
And I'l remember you.(:

Friends;
I just want a strongly bonded bunch of friends.
Literally a group.
You just dont come and go as you like.
It's that simple.
Can't i ?

Judging Judgmental;
" I judged him Bcos he judged me. Fair."
Seriously, judging by th cover sucks.
It's all idiotic nonsense.
Why are people wasting so much time, energy
and causing problems to friendships
and other's lifebcos of all these F-ed up stuff.
Dont think th person looks kind then get away from th person lah.
Dislike what ass siah. Let alone hate.
Why are mankind so so childish and narrow minded and hearted.
Sheesh. What's th problem with everyone.
I hate humans.
Animal lives are so much more innocent.

Life.

2010-09-26T14:03:00.007+08:00

For people who finds life meaningless;
You get born. You cry.
You grow abit and be some little bastard.
And create a hella mess.
Then you grow up more.
If you're good, you be an obedient child.
You study hard and get a good job.
Be a good person and have friends.
Have a family, have kids.
Then eventualy die.
Life seems just that.
No one can change a thing about it.
Some just gives up and hates life.
But. Have you ever thought of th impact you put on other's life?
like someone gives you nice memories.
Or everything you've done before.
Or knowledge you've gain.
It's these all that gives life a meaning.
If your life doesnt have a meaning,
then find some for it.

Life is full of loss and gains;
With everything you lose, you learn to treasure.
With everything you gain, you learn to use it well.
With every experience you get, you learn to live th better of life.

Relationships and problems;
Everytime you lose a chance of relatioship,
there's another one waiting in th future.
Happy or sad, th problem's still th same.
So might as well face it happily, isnt it.
For everything that happens, its meant for you to learn something.

Daughter♥

2010-09-10T02:40:00.002+08:00

31August2010

teachers' day celebrations @ MI.

like all students, expecting performances, giving teachers presents.

nothing much. until she appeared!

this kitty up there, she's called Daughter.(:

as we alighted from th bus, saw some ppl looking at a spot at th primary sch fence(opp our sch).

its was a kitten omg! as i always do, i ran to it and scooped it up.
can you see how tiny she was!!

she was shivering, meowing, claws all out, th whole time i was carrying her.

when i put her near me her nails would be stuck on my uniform or she'd be 'climbing' up your hands.

she seemed like she was looking for her mummy. (that's how she got her name.)

then, assembly's gonna start soon, gonna leave her,

but whenever i tried to put her back into that sch, she'd get outta th fence and towards th road.

it was so dangerous!!

so along with derrick, we went to seek help from th sch's security guard.

he told us th cat mom was in their school.
since th security guard couldnt get away from his guardpost,

he got a cleaner uncle to come and bring her back in.

its like yay he's so good!

BUT. that cleaner uncle for unknown reasons, totally refused to bring her in.

HOW UNCOMPASSIONATE!!!

th kitten's mom is right inside!

i'm sure they both wnna find each other!

she's ssssoooooo tiny , you bear to leave her outside alone??!!!!

hopelessly, we went back to around where we got her and attempted to throw her back in.

still, she ran out.

i rly didnt know what to do. bring her back to school?

i wnna see her grow up!!!

then came Phoephy and another girl.

two more cat lovers^^

after some hesitations we decided to sneak her into MI! (:

uncovers of th girl's jacket, we ran in by th side gates.

left her near th toilets at th canteen, ran to assembly.

aft assembly, ran back to find her. she was there♥

she kept meowing so we figured she may be hungry.

th other girl bought milk and poured some on a plate.

either she wasnt hungry or she's still in th 'milk suckling from her mom' stage,

she walked into th milk instead of drinking it.

she i used a straw to scoop th milk and put it in her mouth.

fun.(:

didnt feel safe just leaving her around th school.

so with phoephy we went to look for a box.

from some room behind th hall, to looking for teachers' help at th hall, then to th staffroom,

blahblahblah, went down to GO, met MrTan(principal),

he got MrSingh(is he th DM?) to give us a box,

he led us to th cafe.

let her there, felt so much better.

and so we left, and U-turned to walk th other way.

we saw MrSingh carrying that box Daughter was in to th back of th cafe.

puzzled. but we went back to th hall for performance.

aft that.. she was no where to be found...

for almost a week i've been worried.

thinking what MrSingh could've done to her!

searching MI, praying to find her.

still, no news.

september holiday. one fine day... math class...

sms: daughter's here! come quick! (something like that lahh.)

immediately ran out of class and down to th canteen.

as though something i've been waiting for a hundred years is here!

...wth no daughter?!

* SMACK YOUR HEAD DAMN IT!

sat there emo-ing. trying to swallow all emotions.

i give up. tears came down like rain.

apologies apologies~

no use. i'm still crying.

but.. i'm forgiving. before half a day ended, all is forgiven.

i was surprised actually. didnt realise how much i yearn to see her again..

i'm so gonna kiss her if i finally find her.

hope came! we asked that cat lover cleaner uncle in school.

he told us, that day MrSingh gave Daughter to him,

and told him to just leave her in some random bushes near to forest!!!!!!!!!!!!!

she's just a baby!!!

but luckily that uncle was a good man and knows cats..

knowing its damn dangerous for her and she'll probably die out there,

he brought her to th blocks near th supermart near school.

there's plenty of other cats and hopefully cat lovers out there.

chances of surviving is so much higher.

thank God there's such kind souls in our school!

eventhough we couldnt find her, and i ended up playing with more other stray cats.^^

its still a GREAT relief. at least she's still alive..(:

hopefully some cat lover brought you home and treat you right.(:

Daughter,
wherever you are, please be safe.

God bless you, many many.♥

- tale

2010-08-25T19:21:00.005+08:00

- its probably to not let me fall any deeper.
then why am i still so affected by it.

i need to be thankful with what i have.
there's always a reason for things to happen th way it does.
this, i keep reminding myself.
but somehow...
i tell myself i dont yearn anymore.
but still...
things you just dont understand.
just cant explain..
you tell yourself you dont anymore.
yet somehow..
its just there. what you feel.
you thought it'd stopped.
but apparently that's not th case.
you told yourself you dont care.
but clear enough, that's not th case.
it's subsiding, yeah, but not much of a help.

it didnt hit me much at first.
who knew th frustrations had a snowballiing effect.
fuming rage comes biting at you.
yeah there's always tmr.
but how many tmrs are we left with.
he'd be leaving even bfr i'll realise..
are there any chances slimmer than this?...

at times you think,
what nonsense is that.
it isnt a big deal is it.
sometimes it just seems pure dumb.
its not like you're really head over heels.
you made your stand that you dont want.
disregarding is alrdy a value in practise.
when unknowingly you slip and fall,
cuts and stings you'll get,
you'd complain and cry,
let all frustrations out,
think th world's crashing down again.
but once you stand up and look at your wound,
you'll think,
whats th big deal?!
no need for that irritating fuss.
taking it shoud be as easy as letting it go.
what does it matter, seriously.

~if there is fate, there is chance.
but if theres no fate, then its really a bye. - Yb.

one full of crap.

2010-08-23T20:29:00.008+08:00

he is one fucking bastard
with obviously no element of a gentleman
every bit of childishness and stupidness still lingers in his blood
gives people nonsense
gets angry with no bloody right reason
without a least bit of th rights
no logical sense
he, i presume, is one who thinks he is "the creme of th crop"
but is truly one narcissist
without a decent brain
asshogged stubbornness
bloody bull shit excuses
ill mannered beast in rabbit skin
no tolerance
character like a petty little girl
with a pathetic little narrow-mind
who assumes its all against him
never does self repent
and expects people to eat that blame
one lazy butthole
whom, i in every right sense, cant see whats good about him
hides from defeat
talks bullcrap
bullies th little girl
an utter coward in a body of a man almost 3times my age.

- i hereby announce, there can never be longlived detente between me and him under one roof.

hi.

2010-08-20T23:32:00.004+08:00

i love badminton.
playing it every wed & fri. (probably)
great workout.
tightened muscles.
stamina training.
replacement for not going for dance.
fun and enjoyment.
bonding with frens.
loves~

damn tired now.
-as they are getting well, i just lost my voice. -.-

hey candy, you know what, i hate you.
i dont wnna care about your existence anymore. take that ass!
alright i'm crapping. i'll just wait till next year. -.-

achievements..

2010-08-10T18:58:00.006+08:00

aft seeing all those unifrom group stuff etc,
why did i abondon npcc just like that?!
damn that senior if i can blame someone.
but then again its still my fault to disregard it all.
why was i so shortsighted?
i didnt wnna be CI cos i disliked our sch's np.
now i'm thinking how good it'd be like to be more involved in these.
i dismantled my npcc uniform and left it everywhere.
now i regret not keeping it properly.
at least for memories?
judging how important memories are to me.
everything can be replaced, but those badges i earned myself one rite.
and my rank, my name tag!
i cant just borrow them right.
now i wish a miracle would happen; someone come knock at my door someday and give me everything.
or going back to westspring and everything is right there in that same old locker.
dumbass.

since young i've always liked th taste of national "togetherness" ?
its so nice seeing those parades..
seeing those police, army personnels.
i've always wanted to be 'involved',
cant realy explain it.
but i see what i want in uniform groups and armed forces.
i want ..
'togetherness' 'righteousness' 'achievement' 'loyalty' 'involvement' 'nationality' 'one for all, all for one' ..
joining NPDP'07 at th police academy..
although those months of training were so tiring,
sun burning on our skin turning us into roast chickens..
but it gave us nice memories and drill skills and all those..
so why didnt i grab th chance in npcc?
seriously did i have a mind at that time, at all?

sheesh. lets talk about music.
after years of piano since i was little,
i just gave it up in lower primary bcos of my idiotic laziness.
now i wish i ca play piano well.
if i didnt givb up at that time i'd be at least grade8 rdy lahh..
dumbass lah!
then now learning guitar.. hope its not another 3min thing.
dance, i thought i'd be enjoying in there,
now i think i suck at it and wnna quit!

I WNNA LEARN: PIANO, GUITAR, KOREAN, POP DANCE...
I WNNA BE: PSYCHOLOGIST, CRIMINOLOGIST, ANIMALIST, RSAF, POLICE, FORENSIC...

i am sooo fickleminded, and i give up so easily.
in studies cca and hobbies.
man i hate myself sometimes.
what have i achieved? seriously nothing!
i musn't let myself regret again!
damn. i go emo.

~ if i can ask for.. i'd ask for memories to be burned into videos so i can replay and look at them as much as i want and i wouldnt forget what's important to me..

National Day Celebration'10 @ MI !

2010-08-06T19:27:00.003+08:00

National Day Celebration'10 @ MI.
i wanna join parade next year!!!
see them march so tempting lahh..
but my np uniform...
WHY DID I ABONDON IT IN MY LOCKER AT WESTSPRING?!!!
I WANT MY RANK AND BADGES! & I MISS MY BATON!
ugh. how i join ndp next year like that. sheesh.
& finally we get to sing along to national day songs, hee.
(dont forget th lyrics & singalong at th end & those lil kids at th runway were sooo cute!)

erh. oh yah, went seoul garden with ersh, zhaofang, derrick, ben lee(tall) and ben lee(taller), shawn, keet and yewf.
9 ppl took three tables so kept changing places.
i seriously smell like barbeque.
we waited for like one hour plus siahh almost didnt go there eat.
(& boys can be sooo irritating and draggy at times. geez)
national day flag stickers on my face,
then one seoul garden stuff was like, " eh! * point at my face".

this is my face.(:

probably going kl with family tmr,
SHOP TILL WE DROP! :DDDD ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
better finish up all homework tnite..

funeral

2010-07-30T01:15:00.007+08:00

how many of you ever sees what happens during funerals?
how many of you ever observed ppl attending th funeral?
or how many of you ever wondered th story between th visitors or them
with th deceased?

Now how should i start..
lets start with my greatgrandma's funeral.

Not long ago my greatgrandma left our lives.
5 days of wake, an eye-opener for me.
our large extended family tree reunite.
sisters brothers children grandchildren..
people of all generations, came together to pay their last respect to
my greatgrandma.
th newest thing i saw was this- on th third day of th wake, my
grandma's brothers, their buddies, their 'brothers', grandson of th
deceased, his friends, his 'brothers', 4-5 diff generations, stood
infront of taima's(greatgrandma) altar, under one man's order, all
bowed in respect to my taima.
there was like what, more than two hundred plus men?
i swear i'm not exaggerating.
first time ever, had i seen such amount of people at a wake.
they're th "brothers". th genuine "brothers", since my grandpa's years.
not to forget those of our age.
even on th last day when th coffin's sent to cremation, those
brothers came to help out, some even helped carry th coffin for th
last walk around th area bfr sending th deceased off.
who says brotherhoods are fake, i've seen a united and loyal side of them.

that aside, lets go into enlightenment.
lol dramatic.
either way, th wake set me thinking, how would mine be like?
(k *touch wood touch wood!)
but really, how would it be like, at your own funeral.

funerals- to some it may simply mean paying a last respect to a dead
person. to some it may be a scary thing. but to some, in this case
people like me, its stories.
try to imagine, if it happens to you, and if you could see
- who would be there
- how would they be like
- how they remember you as
- what did you mean to them
- what did they mean to you
- any regrets
- any mistakes you've made
- injustice you did to anyone
- scars you've left in peoples' hearts
- people you have hurt
- mayb people you've forgotten
- people you dont talk to
- people you want to apologise to
- people you haven't got th chance to tell how important they are to you
- people you wnna say 'i love you'
- precious memories there was
- precious memories you left
- what you've done with these people before
- disputes
(between family friends colleagues etc, these all would lie low temporarily/
cracks can still be visible/ or already unchangeable ugliness)

it reflects life. life of th deceased, life of th family.
everyday, every action, means something.
you may think these are some typical clishe stuff.
life is mundane, life is meaningless, who gives a damn
what you do, ppl just forget about you, they're just some people who
comes in and outta your life, whatever i do doesnt make a difference
to anyone.
now that's so emo and immature.

when you really imagine
your own funeral, you see what might happen.
is that how you want it? would you be contented?
would you have any enemies? would you have unexpected visitors?
would your friends treasure you till th end?
how many real friends would you have at th end of th day?
would there be any misunderstandings you've been dying to clear?
who would respect you? what would you have achieved?
how many people would cry for you?
how many people would continue to remember you for th rest of their lives?
how much your family loves you?
how have you lived your life.
many many questions you can ask yourself.
its your actions that gives you what you get.
if you are loyal and true, so will your treasured ones be.

ok i lost it. i dont know how i intended to write rdy.
anyone understand what i'm talking about? did i keep repeating myself?
i know i'm long winded. and no i'm not thinking of death, i'm still as
positive as i've always been.
just get th gist- it's your life, your story.

i have problems!

2010-07-25T19:34:00.007+08:00

UPDATE! PROMO1 FINAL RESULTS ARE OUT!
H1 GP; E
H1 CHINESE; C
H1 HISTORY; C /D
H2 CHEM; S
H2 PHY; D
H2 MATH; U

Problem One: I DONT WNNA GO FOR DANCE!
so;
- change a cca. ( now i feel dumb for rejecting NEC just like that.)
- be without a cca (focus on my studies!)

change it, remain in it, be in none. ?

Problem Two: MY PROMO1 RESULTS ARE HORRIBLE!
so;
- study hard (really)
- consultations
- anti-procrastination
- complete all homework (before deadline)
- listen in class (stop drifting off)

i'm doing my work, its a progress.
i completed five math assignments in two days, that's called miracle.

Problem Three: I HAVE GROWN FATTER!
so;
- diet. (whatelsewouldidoduhh)
- exercise (pe & dance)

i'm on it.

Problem Four: 'WHYBE'
so;
well what can i say.
- intimidating
- mind snatching
- affector
- yearns
- stares
- dreams
- dilemma
- XH, just wnna be on par
- determination & motivation
- aww
- wth? !!!
- damn, dumb lahh
- everyday
- cross check
- it's just complicated.

just leave it to rest, see how it goes.

Procrastination.

2010-07-14T18:45:00.004+08:00

procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate procrastinate

yes. procrastinate. photos. soon. very soon.
new updates, soon ..... lester dont say i didnt update!

I GOT U-GRADE FOR H2 CHEM AND MATH, S-GRADE FOR PHYSICS.
DAMN. & I SCREWED MY A'LEVEL CHINESE ORAL. DOUBLE DAMN.

and tdae's a sadded dae, for everyone. ANOTHER DAMN.
nvm everybody lets work hard.

BUT. i passed my napfa, i dont need train anymore for this year.
YEAH!!!!! thank God ♥♥

i want piano. RIVER FLOWS IN YOU. & KISS TH RAIN. Yiruma.

i'm bored. bye.

photos. yes photos.

2010-06-26T01:58:00.002+08:00

I SHALL UPLOAD ALL MY PICTURES AFTER PROMO1 !

i ♥ philippines!

2010-06-12T21:33:00.001+08:00

back from PHILIPINES! ♥

alright i'm back but uploading photos is darn slow and
i've got lotsa stuff to talk about for my ocip philippines.

so brb to update when i feel like it! (:

boo!

2010-06-03T01:12:00.019+08:00

Alrights i'm back to blog!

its finally th holidays!

going philippines tmr! , later actually.

finally finished packing my luggage tdae also!

and so long nvr type on laptop keep typing wrong letters uhh. -.-

sooooooo!!!!!

take a look at my new baby!

she's named pinky, in memory of Pinky♥

( my toy pink poodle who accompanied me through childhood, and thrown away by my grandma )': )

yeah, got th guitar when i went batam.

it came from singapore.

then i brought it back to singapore. (th very same day)

abit dumb, but nvm couldnt wait to have it(:

isnt she pretty? ♥ ^^

th guitar shop in s'pore 's at chom pang blk 106.

Now take a look at me♥ (:

long time no see!

this girl next to me here is ShuTing(:

she just had her birthday ytd, 2june.

happy birthday girl (:

( i'll try'da upload more pics of th other girls in MI when i'm back from philippines!)

here's husi! (husnaini♥)

she cute rite(:

and no she still hadnt cut her hair.

patient ppl.

people are saying we look more feminine now(:

oh oh,

this is shawn, th male snow white(:

his skin is really really damn damn fair.

jealous.

see something pinkish on his arm?

yeah thats my name chopped on there(:

look at his face.

this is fishy!♥

he's a sweetie~

and loves to scratch shoes.

his eyes looks lyk eyeliner rite?

so long nvr see eyeliner.

and climber.

saw MI kitty in sch when i went back on monday.

she's one lonely and hungry cat now that its holiday..

accompanied her for awhile..

then when she saw some malay uncle walking by,

she ran off to them.

lol, see how close she is with that malay security guard uncle in sch?

who said cats dont have feelings with humans like dogs do?

kitty kitty kitty ~

colourful eh?

not my hand(:

homework-bound

2010-05-21T00:30:00.005+08:00

currently still awake bcos...
someone's finishing hmwk now.
& i'm keeping my mouth shut till then.
so you better hurry up dumb!
you're lucky there's msn.
i know you're not gonna read this yet when i'm posting.
but stll. hurry up!!!
no more detention for you!

*THANKS GUYS FOR TH COMPANY & ENCOURAGEMENT DURING 2.4KM RUN TDAE! LOVES♥
( zhaofang ruifen keet ! (:
they were running with me when they didnt have to run ! (: )

alright, now me!
so....
ok i've got plenty of uncompleted homeworks too obviously.
anyway, going batam 28-30may,
then 3-11jun ocip phillinpines with sch :D
i'm gonna be a nice girl (:
praying th toilet conditions there would be ok
and buggggs
which i think is inevitible
so leta just hope there'll be less of them...

GP promo1 next wed, omg so fast luhhhhh.
then right after june hols its th rest of th subjects.
uhhhh this is daunting.

& i fail 2.4 once again. twice for this year's napfa.
but both by 1min plus!!!!!
incredible improvement isnt it?????

sicko retard dumb crapppp o.
i'm restless.
there's chem energetics test tmr and i'm sill so blur with it.
ughh. oh n my math tchr mood swing tdae uhh.
scream at uu one second then laugh with uu later.
happened to alot of us just now.

i'm blogging, yeah!
but just killlng time.

shhheeeepppyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.

oh i've been playing around with my hair recently
and got a pink hairband,
shall upload pics some day(:
i'm sick of ponytails!

i wnna dance.....
but not modern dance...
i want modern jazz reggae hiphop all others,
but traditional dances and my current modern danceeeeee.
why can they get us some modern jazz instructors instead of 3 modern dance ones?!!!
k done complaining.
i'm just not made for modern dance.

oh, did i mention my 大舅舅 bought me a phone already?
then th previous owner gave th 2gb moemory card plus plenty of songs for me to pick on!
and they're ranging from 2009 songs to... my mom's generation songs?
sseriously, antics.
but i found my secondary & primary sch loves in there too^^
slowly gonna eliminate some songs in th memoory and reorganize everything.
ps: i still love justin bieber!
but i'm listening to non justin songs alrdy.
i wnna download more songsss.

i'm done blogging rdy but he's still notdone with hmwk.
ughhhh lets continue crapping....

tdae jobez caught a pinkish-purple dragonfly & put it in a sandwich container.
i freaked out once it flapped its wings.
anyway,
randon caught an ant n placed it in a bottle.
at th end of physics class they added th ant into th sandwich box.
later on jobez went releasing them.
at th pond.
then, i duno why, he pressed th container into th pond.
poor ant n dragonfly,
were probably drowning and attacked by th fishes.
luckily jobez took them outta th water again and they were miraculously still alive.
then dragonfly flew off.
i then, was willing to leave th pond.

ok laptop low batt. time to run.
well lay on my bed.
bbye!

hurry up kitty!

2010-05-19T20:52:00.003+08:00

finally went for dance again tdae.
there's another dance instructor that came to teach us tdae.
he's jazz background so taught us differently tdae.
it was fun(:

ok i'm lazy to blog tdae.
bye peeps.

btw, my mom says she's gonna cane me th next time i reach home after 7.
lol .

My Dear Grandfather...

2010-05-12T00:33:00.006+08:00

i remember th last moon festival we celebrated with him..
it was a few days before th actual day..
we managed to get granpa back from th centre (疗养院?)
back to th my grand's house..
we were still happily celebrating as a family at that house that day..
i remember my grandpa moving around th place with a machine supplying him oxygen..
he was already rather weak then...
i remember me, still sec1 perhaps?
it was my exam period..
while he was resting on his bed, i was sitting at th floor of his room,
accompanying him.. studying for my test..
his hands were swollen for some reason i didnt know then..
liquid were flowing out right from his skin..
as though they were punctured...
i remember me constantly changing th tissue i put on his hand,
to absorb th liquid so they wouldnt flow onto th bed..
some relatives came in to talk to him too...
i could only remember briefly he stayed home for 2or3 days..
then went back to th care centre...

he had his own room/ward there...
that was a place where cancer patients stayed...
he was previously at tan tock seng hospital, then transferred there...
everyday after school i would go to there with my parents if i didnt remember wrongly...
all his childrens and their spouse.. (my mom and two other sons... their partners, their children.. my grandma was with him everyday...)
i cant remember how long he stayed there... months?..
but not that long after.. he started seeing weird stuff...
like water stains on th wall..
or bugs around.. when there's actually nth...
th doctor said his cancer cells spreaded... to his other organs..
and brain...
even after having his chemotherapy... they spreaded...
well at least he wouldnt feel so much pain...
i remember him using morphine at some point of time...
these were th signs... if only i knew then....
he could still eat some food...
i remember him eating cold almond jelly when he was still staying in th hospital...
i think my mom told me its because its cold and makes him feel better inside...
but when he was in th center, he had difficulty swallowing water already...

th day before my art exam...
i felt lazy to go to th centre...
because it wasnt near and i've been visiting him almost everyday...
he seemed to be ok...
so i stayed at home while my parents(i think) went to th centre...
how i wish i didnt...
th next day, after my art exam...
i went home... i called my mom...
she broke th news to me...
my grandpa was dead...
it was th actual day of th moon festival...
he was... dead...
i couldnt believe wat i heard,,,
i just sat on my bed crying...
waiting for my mom to come fetch me...
to go see him...
for th last time...

when we reached there...
he was on his bed... laying there...
he didnt move... his skin turned yellow...
my uncles' wifes were crying badly...
so were my mom and grandma...
i cried too...
i was still carrying tons of hopes in my heart...
like th past two times when we rushed to th hospital..
because my grandpa couldnt be woken up..
only to know that it was th nurse who gave him a double doze
of sleeping med, after having us cry and pray for almost th whole day...
he was just sleeping...
how could he be dead now?!
grandma said he got up and asked for a cup of coffee in th morning!
how could he be dead?!
just like that?!!!!
how i hoped that this time, he was just sleeping too...
only relief is that.. he looked peaceful...

th men in th family started making calls...
it was to th funeral company...
i was told to get out of th room.. along with my cousin as we were still young...
th funeral was held under th block of their house...
at th 3days wake..
i was in charge of keeping th lamp which was meant for showing his soul th way to go...
and to burn th paper money for him...
sitting right next to his coffin...
as i was th eldest grandchildren...
my sorrow seemed to have slowly flown off...
mayb because i was still not mature enough to understand stuff...
but somehow i was still hoping some slight sound from th coffin could prove that he was still alive...
th last day, after a long ritual...
family and relatives sent his coffin off...
his body was to be cremated...
at that very point i see his coffin being pushed into th strong flames to be burnt...
i finally admitted... he was dead...

....

this was all so sudden...
i still remember holding his hand while crossing th road...
i remember him buying home my favourite icecream for me to eat...
i remember him buying home papaya fruit juice to drink, and always letting me drink half of it...
i remember those always asking him to go to his room to sleep when he fall asleep on th chair in th iving room in th midnight...
i remember 'stealing' hiss cigarettes and tearing them up and throw them intp th bins...
i remember him hiding my darling pinky(soft toy poodle) because i was plucking her hair too much...
i remember that night he fell down and scraped alot of skin on his hand...
how painful it looked when he poured some med powder i gave him on his bloodied injury...
i remember hearing his cough all th time from all that coughing...
i remember seeing him eat his chinese cough syrup..
and always asking why he doesnt have to drink them from a spoon like we do...
i remember him giving me medicine to eat when i had tummy aches...
i remember... all his love and care for me...
that i took for granted...
finally... his lung cancer defeated him...
he left all of us...
all of us that he loved... and loved him...
even up till then.. he was still caring for me...
th day he died was my last day of exams...
so his funeral wouldnt clash with my exams...
thats what my grandma told me...
why didnt he wait for a few more hours?!!!
why didnt he wait for me to go?!!!
why didnt he wait to see me for th last time?!!!
why?!!!!
why didnt i go th night before?!!!
had i known that would be my last chance to see him still alive...
i'm so sorry...
if only......

now i finally feel all that pain inside of me...
this is my regret...
how i wish i can still have th chance to tell him..
'ahkong, 我爱你'

deadddd

2010-05-02T12:38:00.002+08:00

ahh my blog so dead!
ok now i know how ppl can let their blogs die.
and my sis's annoying! she said that herself(:
at my dad's house now, going out to eat tgt later.
eh my sis doesn't know justin bieber! how can!
i'm so gonna influence her.

so........
i've been studying hard ok!
at least trying to do my homeworks(:
and..........
tdae is so hot! i tied my hair! wth
then......................................
this is why my blog dead,
i forgot wat else to write.
erhh... less interest in dance recently....
mm.....
both teacher's chinese lessons are quite entertaining(:

so,
i'm done, lets wait for th next tym i have stuff to blog about.
not to forget, pic updates.

oh before i forget, my uncle's looking for a phone to buy for me rdy! yeah!!! :D
and ocip to phillipines i'm chosen did i mention that? yeah!
oh and just now, my ezlink card expired wth?!!!
how can that be?!
th mrt ppl still lyk dun trust i'm still a student in govt. sch. geez.

alright i'm done, see ya! :D

thunderstrike

2010-04-17T18:43:00.005+08:00

thunder stroke millennia building that day.
its been raining so much!
some concrete fell and th PA system went bonkers.
uh well, BIEBER TIME!

supposed to swim with siewling tdae but
didnt due to weather.
so instead, i sticked to th com since 2plus..
from justin vids to justin pics and now to justin songs :D
you can sae i'm addicted mesmerized watever,
cos i am ! (:
he's just so cute(:

buttt i gotta go do my homework later...
i've been so lazy since i duno when...
not only am i not doing my math,
but my other subjects as well...
oh tmr morning i'm gonna do math with keet in th morning.
hope i can finish them all!
i hvnt even finish writing that letter to gagan!
& i received hers tdae!
hee i'm so gonna send mine out tmr!!!!!!!

&why is it still so hot when its raining practically everyday?
& seriously that show on tv now '爱',
its so frustrating to watch those ppl luhh
but why do old folks like to watch it so much??

ps: MALCOLM GET WELL SOON!!!
poor thing..

i attached one bieber song at th side and it doesnt autoplay at th moment,
so do give it a click whenever you visit :D
( btw, its favourite girl (: )

:D

2010-04-13T23:55:00.005+08:00

yeah i was sick ):
from friday till monday.
& i was still slacking with teena & lester & play guitar that day :D

SO, I AM BACK! :D

lets summarise;

-lotsa pics to update but i'm lazy
-math homework piling up and i dont feel like caring bcos i'm seriously blur alrdy
-I LOVE JUSTIN BIEBER
stop saying he's gay or i'll kick your ass!!!!!
-loving guitar :D
6months(heymonday) learnt,
baby(justin bieber) & unashamed(starfield, JS cover) in progress.
-its currently 12 midnight
-connection prob in my room so now i'm in th next room with no fan
and i'm freaking sweating
-i need to sleep early cos i've just recovered from my 'influenza'
its some contagious cold, with fever
-i skipped pe tdae(: with an mc which i tot was due tdae but its actually monday/
but nvm teacher kind(:
-'food hunt list'! (:
-i like to use coloured paper clips to diff my papaers(:
-i miss having hagen daas icecream with my colleagues at GITI TIRES
-my favourite subject is officially Chemistry!
-i felt drowsy even without drowsy med ytd and this morning
-should really get to bed now
-i'm freaking sweating and i just bathed
-MalcolmTai ! dont sae i bad lah, miss you also lahh! (:
& go lah go lah, go find your melvin lahh!

ok i'm done.
nite!

oh oh &, poor kahling's doing her Pi !
ahahahaha! goodnight darling!!! :D

i forgot to mention! ;
- derrick left a big(not v big actually) red scratch on my arm tdae!
nice :D its been long since i've got a scratch~ lol.
(ps: i'm not that strong luhh, paranoid guy. time to get his nails broken!)
-& lester hvnt give his blog link !

that pillar

2010-04-03T00:49:00.008+08:00

its empty empty plain emptiness inside
i've lost my pillar.
through with it!
i'm sick n tired of love n relationship
dont even feel like talking bout it.
its pointlessssssssssss.
we lost it all.

dont hang on to an ended relationship
bcos there'll always be
that next one waiting for you somewhere! :D

i'm in some kinda weird anonymous mood now..
i dont know if i'm feeling happy or sad
or just exhausted.
am i restless? in a daze?
like there's something missing.
this feels familiar yet foreign at th same time..

; like some pillar's missing,
th music isnt pleasing me th way it shud,
there's a beetle on th floor right next to me & i'm still not screaming.
this emptiness here,
i'm gonna fill it in with animals & community services!!! (:

insanity~~
frens are still th best for ya~!
not to forget family :D

ps: oh shit where'd that beetle go?!
now this can freak me out ._.

i miss ..
my mummy my daddy lim siewling neo kahling teena see...
uhh dont need me to say you all know i miss you lahh~!!!
(lester leong included! ok?!)
AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
sandra suddenly smsed me just now! heeheeheeeeeee~
unity pri i hvnt forgotten you okkies~~~

babies (:

2010-04-02T20:40:00.007+08:00

looking at that blue sky full of clouds,
listening to that song avalanche,
unknown emotions came to me.
its been long since i've said this;
i wanna see you...

went to York Hotel tdae,
it was my xiaojiuma's sis's baby's full month. lol
a buffet was held.
there were two babies there..
very cute babies(:

this is baby1, th full month babe♥
he's such a cutie~

here's baby2,
his mom's th older sis of baby1's mom
& he's just two weeks older than baby1 !
how sweet! they'll definitely grow up very close
like me n my cousin~^^

this is one of th boxes of cakes they gave out
to th families who came..
so nice right th cupcake!

my parents went vietnam tdae, they'll only b back on monday night.
i didnt go cos i didnt wnna miss sch,
i very guai rite(:

i'm feeling like i'm been missing something..
i dont know why...
i wnna learn more guitar songs!!!!!!!!!!
but i'm so lazy to bring guitar to sch n there isnt much time to learn either.
i wnna use th com till midnight night night tdae!!!
since i'm using th desktop n there'll definitely be no disconnections :D

2010-04-01T16:39:00.002+08:00

finally blogging again!
currently at bukit batok mac trying to finish up some homework.
(me, keet, derrick, yan)
but chinese's too dry so using keet's laptop now :D

CIP day tdae, went back to th blocks we distributed th fliers at last sat
collect th food donations.
donated blood on tuesday; i was one of th lucky ones to pass all those tests and successfully
donates th blood!
so happy :D
and it doesnt hurt n th bandage was so cute!
but th feeling of a thick needle stuck in your skin feels kinda weird.
i'm taking iron tablets (:

last friday went back to westspring sec sch !
with magnets! (me, kahling, husnaini, teena, malcolm, lester!)
once we stepped into westspring, th familiar sound of th band welcomed us (:
it felt so good to go back there!!!
i realised how much i missed being at that place with all my frens(:
saw alot of familiar faces..
saw miss goh n plenty of 4Cs ~
went back to our old 4c classroom (:
npcc, needless to say, no improvement ._.
tsktsk.
went bp mos for those time again(:

i forgot wat else i wnna sae.
i'll update some pics th next time i go online and not lazy to post them .
my appetite decreased once again!
i'm happy now :D

-

2010-03-27T23:10:00.003+08:00

you've never listened to me,
since when did you ever do.
what i've said are non relevant,
only what you think are facts.
were what i said crap?
they're plainly for your good,
you just dont take it at all.
do whatever you want,
as if i could help.
that's your bad.

th three words ily,
means alot to a girl.
it gives that sense of security,
th sense of want.
you think its nothing,
well that's too sad for you
cos th girl's gonna play it back on you.
dont regret when its all toppled.
hold it tight when you have it.
when it's flown away,
there's no meaning in holding on to a broken string.
stop wasting your time.

it probably is th best this way.
i'm drained off all my energy to deal with this.
i'm sick n tired of th term "love & relationships"
hopefully i wont commit again in these three years.
dont occupy my mind,
then i'm free.
i wont even care, i wont bother anymore.

school stuff have already taken 85% of my schedule.
i rly have no excess energy to waste.
this goes to those in th same situation,
school is your main focus.
focus on school n school activities and nothing else,
this would really help.
for us, ' after today, its tomorrow '
its quoted from a dance instructor MrJasper.
he meant it in a positive way.
i wnna interpret it in a student's way.
everyday's busy day.
school tdae, school tomorrow.
homework done tdae, new one tomorrow.
project settled, lets do th next.
earth hour finished! oh its cip.
hectic student life.
homework, projects, cip, cca.
well its worthwhile.(:

mainpoint; we've got no time to waste.

& i wnna stress this;
DONATE BLOOD IF YOU CAN!!!
" An act of kindness, no matter how small, is never wasted "
and this is why i'm gonna do anything i can to help anyone,
when i decide to help,
and not complain when things are bad,
nor ask for anything in return,
helping others already gives yourself a sense of achievement.(:

kitty!! ♥♥♥♥♥♥

2010-03-21T22:49:00.004+08:00

here's climber(/jumper) i mentioned previously..

she's clawing on my skirt..

see her claws? hah(:

now let me introduce eyeliner!

can uu see her eyeliner like black colour thing

around her eyes??

so nice uhh...

met her on th way from mac back to sch with shuting in th morning..

she's unafraid of ppl and she's really cute♥
she's probably my favourite cat of th year^^

( well at least till now..(: )

posting

2010-03-21T22:04:00.008+08:00

i've been so lazy to post...
lazy to update pics...
if only there was some auto uploaders...
sch reopen tmr...
homework's gonna bomb us once again....
i could finally not have any homework to do these few days!
well i dont know if there's any homework i missed out..
but watever lahh we'll see tmr...

been going back sch every single weekday of march hols...
tiring, but bcos of this i came to know another sch cat!
i named her 'climber',
like her name, she climbs(or jump) up chairs and tables..
for two mornings that i went to th canteen in th morning,
she was there to acc me n crawl onto my lap when i seat down..
she so cute..^^
but she claws on my skirt for some reason
and her paw's rreal dirty..
she added plenty of black spots on my skirt..
on friday, last day of dance camp,
we had some food at th canteen cos its party,
climber was there, everyone lyk freaked out.
i was th only one who went to play with it..
hah, she's dangerous whn there's food around lahh..
so.... yeah keet was there with me with th cat and away from th dancers..
lol. MrToh gave it one hotdog.
so keet tore it to pieces n got more food for it.
but she only liked th hotdogs.(:
so she sticked to keet th whole time after th food..
layed like a baby on his laps.
so cutee~

on friday too, randon thought me th correct chords for 6months :D
and a little of decode which i had a hard time trying to press th strings properly..
and another melody which i duno belongs to wat song.
brought his guitar home, its black lehh!!!!! :DDDDD
and its truely ALOT lighter n indeed smaller compared to th usual ones i've played with.
now i can play th full song! together with th song playing...
and not that fluent..
so, its just 85% learned.
now my index, middle n ring fingertips are sore from th metal strings..
and there's a blister like thing on my ring fingertip, i dont want any blisters!!!
but abit hard to restrain myself fom guitar when its just lying there n i'm starting ti
get th hang of it.

i'm sleepy! guess i might sleep earlier tnite...
no dance tmr! rest!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
but i need to brun off those newly added calories!
my appetite seemed to increase ever since exercises increased.

My New Motto;
' All Pain is Worth ! '
this got to me bcos,
1. dance warm ups are lyk hell when th teacher is in bad mood.
2. fingertips hurt alot when th guitar strings you're pressing on are thin metal...
3. no doubt all sports or body trainings includes tons of pain
4. emotional pain gives you knowledge and understanding of yourself and th world around you, physical pain trains your endurance and perseverance.
5. i believe majority of pains has their benefits for th 'victims'

and thus; it is all worth. (:

guitar♥

2010-03-17T00:02:00.004+08:00

first of all, our robot won first price!
great shooter system! thanks to keet! :D
(its name somehow changed from shootingstar to jessica? with th other team's bob?)
alot of time to slack during preparations..
randon n keet brought guiar to sch..
randon kept playing n singing,
thn teach me how to play 6months (heymonday)!
thn he realised he taught me th wrong chords.
lol.
so when th guitar at home gets its new strings,
i'll practice guitar once again!!!
& learn decode(paramore)! :D

oh yah, innovative workshop,
our group's - multi correctiontape.
expected it to be crapp so didnt put any effort in presentations.
in th end got chosen to -present in centre stage . lyk wth.
so someone wanted me to mention his name here -
ok lah, oscar asked me for a plaster again tdae.
contented? (:
anyways didnt get to top 3.
haha who cares lahh waste time only.
we didnt even want to invent these stuff.

stayed back aft robotics.
th guys played guitar.
ben's mp3 was so sensitive to sound during recording,
when he recorded randon n keet playing that song tgt,
we could even hear th birds chirping!
i must rmb to get that recording from him.

oh n where's th robot posters now?
i want those photos back!!!!
dont waste! $3 nehh.
n junetta settled most of th posters ,
i didnt have to do much except for penning those points ytd.(:

wat else do i wnna add?
cant rmb.
my phone needs some recovering seriously.
ugh.
blocked ytd due to bill stuff.
lucky its activated again this morning..(:
contacts disappeared that day..
now my sms shortforms..
fine. i'll live with it.

math test tmr. half dead rdy. -.-
time to sleep ! gdnite!(:

back!

2010-03-14T16:41:00.007+08:00

yeah i'm finally done with my GP blog!!
although its plain, i've got all those stuff MsLee wants us to include rdy.(:
weebly's so laggy lahh.
but using it to categorise info was ok..

check it out!
rays10s2.weebly.com

i just saw this grp on fb,
' holidays are for resting. not for projects!'
ohh how right!!!
its th march holiday!
we're filled with projects,
evey single day of th mar hols week i've got activities at sch.
fine i'm not complaining.
up next, - robot posters, chi grp essay, earth hour.

mon, tue - innovation workshop
wed - math makeup, chem make up, chem SPA
thur, fri - dance camp! th only one i'm looking forward to.

my wounds are all dried up,
doesnt hurt anymore,
no need to put plasters rdy!
thanks for th med..(:

i hope i can go back to westspring with them on 26mar, friday.
i chose this day bcos, i wnna go back on a sch day n i'm only free on fridays!
guys i want go back with you all!
sadly teena has to work so she going back on a sat..):

eh why are you blaming me when i didnt do anything?!
i didnt deliberately do anything rite!
why are you even siding him?!
so wat if he's afraid of th heat?!
i'm cold blooded thn dont nd th wind is it?!
jus bcos he wants to dumbly slp here share that fan with me,
i have to shift th whole fan to him?!
he feels its too hot n so assume ive got th whole fan to myself
jus bcos th fan seemed like it was 100% towards me?!
i didnt shift that fan
i was freaking kept shifting this tall chair awae from blocking th fan!
n you accuse me of having th fan all by myself,
i'm angry as i hate being accused plus i'm alrdy frustrated with projects.
i'm trying to finish up my web
you're there freaking irritating me.
so wat if i'm rude and bang things around me?!
who would be gentle when you're angry?!
and you had to side him jus by hearing sounds and us talking loudly
and presume / blame me for it?!
f is he th only one who can get angry?!
i dont have feelings and temper isit?!
you sae he gave in to me for almost everything?
like i didnt have to endure those freak times he gave n his freaking existence in th first place?!
dont take advantage of my acceptance!
i could've made life like hell for you two if i wanted to!
dont freaking blame for everything!
we clash bcos of his f attitude alot of times can!
he isnt all that good!
who asked him to be so narrow minded at those times?!
dont agitate an alrdy agitated person
or war would be declared!
understand?!!!!!!!!
& FUCK!!! STOP GIVING ME THAT STARE!!!!!!
CCB LAHHHHHH DONT DRAIN MY PATIENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

F

2010-03-13T01:14:00.003+08:00

F lagging. F connections.
F attitute. F you. F Bh.
F f-er get out of my life lyk f-ing now can.

i seriously miss all you guys lahh...
magnets... i wnna be with you all...
i'm so f-ing irritated lahh.
intimidate me somemore its gonna be bad.
i need to talk to you guyssss
any of you, everyone of you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm loving dance practices...
i'm not gonna quit my cca.
i'm not a quitter!
like i said,
' i will accept any challenges that comes upon me! '
oh & i need to get slimmer!
activist week, i'll be involved in spreading earth hour msg thing.
we aren't doing anything about it yet.
wth are we waiting for?
how can we depend on teacher to tell us wat to do?
we have th responsibility in our hands.
but i dont rly care now.
i'm alrdy feeling overflooded.
homework, gp proj, chinese proj, robot- th poster thing, and th earth hour .
i wnna hurry up n settle GP blog first but my connection is
a real hinder in th progress!!!
due on sunday but its lyk starting fr scratch now.
i nd all th help i can get now. throw any ideas you have in guys!!

MAGNETON!

2010-03-07T23:16:00.019+08:00

i think my handbook is so cute now.(:
thanks saferah for th stickers!

its finally outing fr us magnetons!
although not all was there, its still great with all uu guys around!
(me, kahling, teena, malcolm, lester!)

those grp pics taken are stl in Mal's cam.

malcolm faster upload!!!!!
talking bout him, he asked me to mention more bout him here.
haha so i was th attention seeker ehh mal?

plaza sing, suntec, esplanade, marina barage.

that's our intenery fr tdae:D

arcaded at plaza sing, no ddr sad fr me n kahling):

mos-ed thr n played with poker cards.(:

th cs fr tdae,

(customer service- term fr th ppl clearing tables, i liked doing cs whn i was at mos last time!)

was so kind jus now.. helped us find seats.

we play n make so much noise she also nvr anngry one.

usual cs would jus ignore any customer that comes in n

stares at anyone noisy or dominates th seats fr too long.

this is th choc fondue(malcolm's treat!)

at esplanade, at th restaurant "blind man"

all choc shop, & their damn ex.

everyone fed each other with those sticks,

so fun(:

but lester didnt each much had to force him too eat!

it was fr his b'dae lehh how can dont eat!!!

jian wat fei lahh.

those white papaer slips with our names

- meant for exchanging candies mal wanted us all to get

n sae wat we appreciate bout th ppl who's name we've got.

oh so christian.(:

i love taking pics at th barage!

had fun with th sceneries, nice atmosphere, cool breeze,

kite filled skies, beautiful place , most important- th acompany

of fellow magnets♥

next outing go swave board with husi !!!

i dont care! husi must b there th next time!!!

had fun taking pics lyk this..

th s'pore flyer! n mal&teena! haha

how cute~

me teena lester sang on th wae frm barage to mrt..

we were at th front door.

ppl stared at us we noe but didnt care.(:

teena said th bus driver clapped whenever th bus stopped.

so cute uhh~^^ this shows our singing is not bad!^^

i rly want those pics we all took jus now!!!

so cuteee so fuunnnn

mal you better hurry up!!

i've mentioned uu several times rdy uu happy now?

You guys;

thanks malcolm fr planning all these,

treating us fondue

& letting us all drain his iphone's batt ! :D

& thanks guys fr agreeing to have dinner at yewtee^^

too bad i cnt reach home toooo late.

but i'm alrdy v happy to finally have th freedom

to go anywhere in s'pore with frens

till th sun had set n moon came out

later than 10 , thn rch home.(:

oh n lester! take more pics lahh!!!!!!!!

dont kena force thn take!!!

♥♥♥♥♥

that's th state of my wounds now..

it doesnt look like a big deal frm th pics.

but its, f-ing red, skinless, wet, looks bloody,

literally two holes right there.

washing them without plasters on woud be hellish i guess.

touching them now with bear hands can make me scream.

its deep but, hurry up heal!!!!!!

i dont wanna think about it...

i'm not worth any of your tears...

ouch.

2010-03-07T00:06:00.014+08:00

building robots was fun actually!
seperated into grps,
my grp had 3boys 3girls.
suprisingly us girls were th ones fixing up th robot.
girls better at following instructions?
we were given one big box- th robot kit, were all th parts r inside n
papers showing instructions step by step.
as shuting's dad's an engineer,
she brought th box home fr consultation & some help.(:
oscar's grp so free luhh, oscar fix th robot by himself!
pro lahh you ! stl sae lyk lego.
th sebestian kp playing th piano, which was very nice.

sorry i couldnt wakeup in time for breakfast !
- to th girls

my feets now feel lyk they'd had a war ..
th origin was - a very tight shoe.
3plasters on each foot.
that red part in th pic
is actually flesh without th skin.
it was daaaaaaaammmmmmmmmnnnnnnnn pain when water touched it.
imagine that on both legs.
well survived it.
hope it'll stop hurting by tmr.
i know i looked hideous with th way i walked fr th whole day...

离开你是对的吗?..
我会后悔吗?..
还是好不习惯没有你的陪伴...
也许这样真的是最好的...
真的结束了...
好好过自己的生活吧...

i still have your jacket with me everynight...

SPORTS DAY !

2010-03-05T22:08:00.010+08:00

sports day!
we all were doing homework ..(:
then suddenly a sapphire senior suddenly shouted at us.
(briefly); " hello sports day not homework day!
cheer for ur house lahh! "
lol he v drama.
below is our GP grp!(:
took th pic during sportsdayy

this is wat i drew on my handbook.
i miss orientationnnnnnnn.....):

this is a 'bizzare' cat i spotted on th wae to 188busstop jus now!
'bizzare' in th way it mioaws..
it goes, "描. 描. 描. 描...."
th same tone as th chinese words.
its miaow sounds unusual, thats th main point.

modernn dance training on monday!
yeahhhh i can finally danceeeee..
someone said if we couldnt get in sc, we would auto be in our 2nd choice.
but i forgot wats my 2nd choice.
duno if i nd to find th modern dance tchr first..

music is ur best companion when you're waiting for someone!
( talking bout music, i love th musics played tru out th event~
all great songs~(:
& during th sch song aft th event, i sang!
th sch song is nice to sing! fanny agrees with me!:D )
so, while waiting fr my mom at bugis jus now..
i went into GRAMOPHONE.
listened to da'mouth 大嘴巴's album using th headphones provided..
v loud v nice..(:
then came across Adam Lambert's album his cover pic is soo feminine lahh!!!
almostt couldnt recognize him!
y is he not straight lahh... ke xi lehh...
such a rocker but not straight.
a ppl from CREATING TALENTS PTD LTD
came to givb me that name card again jus now..
lol told her i went thr bfr alrdy but didnt get those pics taken she kept asking why..
robotics programme tmr... -.-
i wanted my sleep.

我还不知道怎样回答你
我还不习惯
能不能只谈友情

2010-03-05T01:00:00.003+08:00

a freaking teacher pissed me off tdae.
ugh who f cares lahh.

ytd chinese seperated into another class.
for special MT (chi A'level this year)
th teacher asked us to draw th contents of th passage ; cartoons
instead of plain dry stand n read.
we had to each summarise on one paragraph first.
there's only one guy in our class! its wenjing(wsss)
pathetic one lahh haha.

GP grp blog created tdae.
gotta take that grp pic tmr!
n its finally sports day!
allowed to go to sch in PE tmr~
& completed one whole math exercise aft sch tdae~!
thanks to my 'teacher' again~^^

PE tdae...
10 rounds timed.
i dont like this style.
so not good fr running tdae.
in th end only ran 6 rounds 30min.
mostly walked.
did trainings similar to badminton trainings.

dont feel like talking much now.
bye.

oh n not taken by sc.
modern dance next.

To You ;

2010-03-05T00:29:00.003+08:00

& all that you were showing me was that you dont love me anymore..
now you tell me this?...

你对我的冷以杀了我的心，救不活了。

i'm saying this straight. ;

i'm sorry i've broken your heart..
i didnt know how much you've loved me..
neither dd i know if i was always on ur mind n how much you
want us to be good again...
i'm so sorry but i'm tired now..
i've lost it all...
my heart was weakened from all th tough times you gave...
all those times you turned cold..
you mentioned they're for my good..
but it hurt me so much..
it gave me every single reason to think that you're sick n tired of me..
resulting in me attempting to end this for a few times..
i'm not entirely at fault, you're not at all faultless..
let this be your training ground..
dont ever be cold to ur partner unless you're prepared to leave them.
bcos by being cold to them,
you're giving all hint of breaking up...
your too late...

i'm keeping my heart.

i♥cats!

2010-03-03T20:09:00.003+08:00

my thighs are still so tight from ytd's
PE lesson..
& its PE again tmr!
muscle achings but, whee~~~
can wear sec tshirt tmr, dun nd wear that oversized orientation t liao!
stayed back aft sch fr homework,
initially thought i could finish alllll of my work,
at least those needed to be handed in by tmr.
but, who knew i would take so long for just a 5qn chem paper.
but! i managed to complete th whole ws n hand in to mschen!
( with th help of my new teacher - zhaofang! haha)
first time i complete an assignment properly!

i forgot to mention ytd,
i finally see my sch's cat again!!!
she's soo fattttt~
but so cuteeeee..
i wnna have a cat of my own..):
n there's plenty of guppies n tadpoles in my sch's pond(:

things left unsaid are now things you dont have to know.
its pointless for anyone to know.
it doesnt change anything,
and nothing could be changed anymore.
you'll get oer it soon.
once again, sorry...

like bad siahh.....):

treacherous

2010-03-02T23:28:00.005+08:00

i'm liking PE lesson!(:
ran nonstop(well slow jog) for 20min straight!
followed by jumping up th stadium steps.(standingbroadjump style)
i'm training to b an athlete! like real.
watever i need to pass napfa by hook or by crook.
my new goal(:
stamina training every pe lesson anywae.

olympic fest on friday, no lesson rite, can we cheer?
i thnk we need to.
go sapphire!(:

i'm still not used to it.
adaptation to be done with soon.
& that's th freedom of speech you get.
isnt it better?
dont get held back by something pointless anymore.
once a quality goes bad, there's no way
you can make it good again.
plus, th creator doesnt have th energy n heart to rebuild it anymore.
so its dead, gone, bye.
5mnths isnt short. lesson learnt.
memories are for keeps.

- thanks to modern technology, you dont actually
have to get in touch with a person to know wat's happening.

everything happens for a reason,
every rule is set based on something relevant.
no use complaining then just accept it.

7MARCH2010
MAGNETON OUTING!
I'M WAITING FOR YOU~~~

holy history

2010-03-01T23:38:00.005+08:00

omg i'm so stumped by th hist notes teachr wanted us to read.
it was a telegram frm a US embassador in USSR to Truman(then president of US)
th english , needless to sae , is so chim.
first two page duno wat he talking lahh..
i dont even noe wats th thing their talking about.
are those content we need to know?
took me so long to get my brain inside th paragraphs.
but good news, physics on vectors now, so far i can do th questions! yeah!

i'm gonna have an early night tdae, i rly want more slp
but alwaes lazy to slp more during weekends bcos its lyk i can finally dun care if i'm gonna b sleepy th next day.
but then i complain on weekdays n
yearn for more slp.
constantly contradicting myself.
uhh well who cares jus do wat i want when i feel to.
tmr's PE lesson yeah~
gotta tell myself, " i love running i love running! yeah~~~"
hol crap.

TORCHED !

facing it is th best way.
oh fret, suffocated.
its over, i'm so sorry.

intolerance

2010-02-28T22:56:00.006+08:00

i've been in th mood of intolerane
little things can get me all fired up,
so dont irritate me.
i'm sure i'm gonna explode if someone agitates me.(:

i couldnt do my
chem n math homework just now!
i dont know if i'm too distracted or i rly dont know how to do.
but fine, i givb up.
do it tmr & teacher to go tru.
not rly in th mood fr homework.
i noe its procrastination but i rly didnt noe how to do.
creep its just th beginning of th chapter i'm alrdy having difficulty.

i had a thought jus now,
if i chose th easier path of poly,
would i b able to do better?
everything there seems sooo much easier.
we've heard how ppl taking A'level say how tough it is.
i thought i would b able to cope, but now i'm getting kinda scared...
but thinking on th otherhand,
imagine how th jc peeps r headaching now.
i've been privileged with an extra year.
i have more time to practice n get better.
i cant be demoralised so soon!
i can do it! dont feel disheartened!
everyone on th A'level path 加油!
nobody said this was going to be easy n we've also known that!
buck up everyone!

consultations starting now!
tuesday- chem consultation.
need math n physics too!!!

To All;
Brace yorselves,
its gonna be a bumpy ride!

hey! i'm waiting for PE to come!
new teacher duno how's his lesson style...
my biggest fear in sports is long distance running.
but jaz said MrSer,
(our class girls' actual PE teacher, if i didnt rmb wrong)
alwaes made his PE class ppl run double th amount of rounds other classes ran.
but she also mentioned that more for guys.
so, lets hope he'll be lenient with girls...
remind you MrSer, we girls aren't going for NS !!
& i want th results for th SC interview!!!

whenever i see...
without settling this,
i cant do anything...

& i've been over it, really,
certainly, positively,
most probably,
not really,
i dont know.

STUDENT COUNCIL

2010-02-26T20:36:00.008+08:00

SC INTERVIEW ;
3teachers + more than 3sc, in a room.
that's how th interview was conducted.
before we could go in, we had our names written on an orange slip
that was to be given to th teachers when we go in.
everyone was nervous, talked talked talked, made new frens too.(:
th sc bought a tub of ice cream to share.
lol, so th teachers n SCs were eating icecream during interview.
so relaxing ehh? even th interviewees(including me) ate icecream too(:
but after th intrview.
we need to hold a whiteboard with our interview number n take pic, lol.
~forced smiles~

TH PROCESS ;
went in, greeted, before i could sit down,
th teacher who caught my 'blue' contacts said,
"let me see if your eyes are blue tdae, i was supposed to check ytd but didnt"
(if i didnt rmb wrong, & its PURPLE!)
lol i wore brown tdae but i took it out before th interview.
thn another male tchr said "blue ?? i prefer red"
lol thn th one would caught me asked me if i have red contacts.
i said " no, but you can buy(: "
lol ok lahh they quite joke joke, th atmosphere wasn't
as suffocating as i thought it would, like during oral.
plenty of laughters..
but th questions they ask, nd answer on th spot, i not v good at that lahh..

what do you think is your weakness
which school rule do you think is th most unfair?

weakness- shy at times & not able to speak up or volunteer?
so knowing that i was from NPCC,
they wanted me to shout a command to prove that i can shout.
and so they covered their ears. lol but i didnt shout.
sch rules- couldnt think of any..
thn tchr said ' how bout not allowing blue contacts?' & someone suggested skirt length.
yeah i'm not happy bout grooming rule ok.
bcos they dont affect our studies at all.
But my conclusion was ..
school rules are rules, we cant jus change them..
anywae all rules are set for some reason.
even if we're not happy with it wat can we do?
they wont change just bcos we keep complaining about it.
lyk in sec sch, we complain bout banning handphones in sch,
years n years ppl bring this up, but wats th use? nth happens to it.
so, just accept th rules, & who follows th grooming rules closely these days anywae.

th interviews ending on wed.. so th results shud b out next week?
& me yanqi n zhaofang were shortlisted fr th NE council tdae, lol.
said we were those who didnt choose NEC as a choice but met th criterias..
lol. but if i dont get into SC, i'll definintely go for modern dance.
ohh n they say there's no campaign needd bcos th criterias for th sc nomination is high engh.
yeah~ so th interview was th final stage of selection.
all we can do now is, Wait Wait Wait.

what shall i say...
i know nothing at all...
how do i conclude it...
how do i maitain th state of that...
feigning ignorance to that, would it help?..
th initial, th progress, th stop.
what do i do now...

grass & th sky♥

2010-02-25T21:54:00.003+08:00

i love tdae's PE lesson!
surprised to see me sae that?
hah, we were seperated into diff teachers..
girls n boys of each class had own grp teachers..
but my class' girl grp tchr mc, so another tchr took over.
at th beginning of PE, all assemble,
as we were late.. actually i didnt realise we were all late
& hey, me ruifen n shuting were th first to be there lehh.
oh, is late settling down.
so we were punished.. every single student there..
pushups & clutches.. quite many times..
till my arms went weak and everyone's palm bcm red on full of holes
due to th ground(running tracks of stadium).. so pain luhh.
then went into our groups, ran 2rounds..

thn did stretchings.
but we did it on grass.
so.... we touch, sat, lay on th grass...
so literally, any exposed parts of our body,
were covered with grass.
including our hair.
(except for face!)
eew. but when we laid down for those situps n clutches, you could see th whole sky above you.
beautiful blue clouds.. you can rly see Nothing But Clouds!♥
later on went hockey pit - ran fronwards backwards n both sidewards.
funny siahh, everyone was laughing bahh..

then PE ended.
teacher want us to send a PE rep(which we didnt hvb at that tym)
to mark attendance bfr we can b dismissed.
no one wanted to volunteer..
dragged on for quite many moments, 2period's gonna end soon...
suddenly, i raised my hand.
so, now i'm thh PE rep.
k my frens were surprised. lol?
& pressurised me to b good example n pass napfa! lol!
omg napfa coming .. but...
damn lahh i scared of 2.4 !!!):

& walao physics hohh, i lost rdy lahh!
blur diao le lohh duno how to do qn.
gotta restart by myself by this weekend.
must faster catchup!
& tmr's sc interview!!! omg!!!
but 5min/person? heh(:
up next's campaign le lohh..
husi's school's sc nomination result gonna b out on monday...
Jiayou uhh husi !

* I CAN TAKE ON ANY CHALLENGES THAT COMES TO ME!!!
BRING IT ON!!!

& my body's soooo gonna acheee tmr. my right arm's starting to hurt alrdy._.

purple eyes~

2010-02-24T23:32:00.009+08:00

PURPLE. --- BROWN.

purple contact lenses~ was caught by a male phys teacher..

he said, " no blue contact lenses allowed, i'l check on you Tomorrow "

hehe so good nvr demand removing it at that very time.

unlike in sec sch, lame lahh.

n it's purple! he saw it as blue?
so i'm gonna have to wear brown next tym.

tmr PE again!

i hurt my leg muscle again!

i ran/ jumped abit last nite, & thn th muscle felt lyk it tore apart.

this morning i forgot n exerted too much strength,

i almost couldnt walk.

each step i take i can feel immense pain.

almost wanted to take a taxi to school.

now its ok.. but PE first lesson tmr..

would i be able to run?

COPPER+... I FORGOT

oh btw, ytd had chem prac.

our prac teacher said

" if you happen to see any interesting colours, you can take out your handphones to take a picture of it "

so nice~ so th pic above is my chem experiment.(:

HT period tdae talked bout CIP & volunteery work.

me & Stephaniemary(fanny!) decided to be activists!(:

i was interested in lyk (6/11) of th areas for vonlunteers(:

community service here we come!

met up with husi again tdae..

she had her sc intrview(pjc) jus now &&&&

she became so stressed aft that!

she said she did badly, her mind went blank

& she's disappointed..

omg friday's my turn........

got frustrated & sadded fr not knowing how to do math & physics homework!!!

so easy only but i cnt do, math asked teacher she didnt ans my question,

couldnt find th part on th notes where i jotted down notes fr phys..

ugh! let's jus wait fr tchr to go tru ._.

*time to get over it. before it gets deep.

morning sleep bug

2010-02-23T20:22:00.005+08:00

early in th moring...
th first two periods of tdae...
soooo hard to keep my eyes open...
this causes th effect of missing out wat th teacher said..
which leads to not understanding th topic...
and it was physics lesson!!!
ugh. i alrdy slept for 6hours...
& PE lesson...
damn was late so went 'red carpet'
(which means going for one round around th stadium)
including usual running, it was 3rounds fr tdae.
drain my stamina & my mouth was absolutely dry...
i'd rather climb stairs...
Height & Weight! ; 158cm , 45.8kg!
did i grow tall? i cant rmb my height whn i was sec4.
my mom said th last tym i told her my height it was 156..
so tt means i've grown taller? :D
& i didnt gain extra weight! Yeah!!! :DD

tmr's SC interview has been postponed to friday...
but there's th special MT class on friday.
guess i'll have to miss it.
hey, people usually gets sleepy in th afternoon uhh?
our GP teacher called it th sleep monster.
guess mine is called 'Morning sleep monster'.

When you truly love someone,
you wont ever get sick of seeing him.
But when you really do(get sick of him),
then its over babe.

*at least that's wat i believe in.

so do i say bye now?

For every step that you take, there would be consequences.
So before you take a step, always consider carefully.
Make sure you wont regret taking the consequence.

dusty table

2010-02-22T23:53:00.009+08:00

21feb2010,
went to someone's house..
it was right beside my school!
i could see Millennia right from th windows!

Millennia from a different view~(:

22feb2010,
chemistry n physics started teaching.
for physics we're going tru forces bcos of th lack of pure phys back ground.
so now its lyk bridging for us.
but for chem, although its on moles n those..
its rather confusing.. gotta get more sleep for a clearer mind..
well at least i could do most of th questions for my homework just now..(:
needs analysis MsChan wants us to do, i cant open it i duno y.
tmr's a long day.. school till 4plus...
plus PE!! i suppose we're gonna hvb real PE lessons tmr.
geez.):
but i wnna get th PE shirts!(:

ok i'm sleepy, summarised.
went home with saferah & yanqi via batok & mrt tdae(:
finally someone to accompany me home on th mrt!!^^
gotta get th GP group photo taken by friday, lol stl nd name,
put name tag lahh?
who's gonna b th leader & secretary?
sabo those who weren't on th train with us just now!
hey, that's only ruifen.
lol. so tmr decide.

sleep time!
my honey's here with me at my new house today!!
yeah gotta hug her to sleep!(:
& here's my honey♥

i just hate how th word format becomes disfigured
everytime i attach a picture!!!
And my swollen inner cheek's been giving me problem
chewing n pronouncing S !!!
but i'm stl on heaty stuff. cant stop a craving.(:

& i just gotta sae,
YCJL, ISS.

Chingay!

2010-02-21T03:04:00.016+08:00

omf i'm finally able to post!
th connection's been giving me problems for an hour.
& my inner left cheek is swelling!
now its hard to bite my teeth.
i must finish this post quickly bcos its alrdy 3:07
& i gotta wake up early tmr.

i went to Chingay'10 tdae!
with my dad n little sis.

that's us!(:

guess wat?
i spotted several familiar faces within th paraders!!!

first of all, Adrian (MI senior)!
he was with th lion dance troupe!
but not one of th lions.
didnt manage to get a pic of him.

then!

can see anot?

looks familiar?

remember that big purple bell pants?

yeah!! our very own, MI DANCERS! :D

isnt it great to see familiar faces performing outside of school? ^^

& i wnna sae i love my school.(:

Millennia Institute~ lol.

next, i saw patricia(westspring sec)!

she was a cosplayer.

with cute purple(?) long hair.

i think that's her bahh?

she walked passed rather fast.

didnt manage to get a pic of her as well.

there were mediacorp artistes as well.

Bryan Wang lu jiang, Gurmit singh & Quan yi feng!

well i was lucky engh to be seated at th front row

so i can take lotsa pics n vids.(:
then there were fireworks.

this is where we were.

singapore flyer looks nice.(:
there's that party till 4am after chingay siah!

next tym i wnna join!

sounds lyk fun lah!

overall chingay wasnt as boring as i thought it would be..

mayb bcos of th warmth of familiar faces(:

n th performances & 花车s are quite nice themselves.(:

except that th 'yellow river' part is slightly tooooo long.

soooo many ppl fr that session.

ok, after around 50mins i'm finally done with this!

adding those pics makes it more tedious.

th words space out each other each time

and th pic ends up at th top of th post no matter wat.

ok i'm tired now & we had supper at teckwhye jus now.(:

becks & singha~

& i dont rly care much now. goodluck to all.

AND MY DAD SAYS HE'S GONNA QUIT SMOKING FROM MONDAY ONWARDS!!!!!

YEAH!!!!!!! FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HE'S GONNA USE THAT SMOKE QUITTER STICKER THING..

PASTE ON HIS ARM OR SOMETHING.

& NOW I KNOW WAT TO GET FOR HIS NEXT BIRTHDAY,

MORE SMOKE QUITTER THINGS!!!!!!

HOPE HE SUCEEDS!^^ ^^ ^^

YOU THINK I'M PLAYING?!

2010-02-19T23:27:00.004+08:00

REGARDING SMOKING!

well i mentioned on fb,' i hate it when my loved ones become smokers.
non-smokers, dont even try it and risk getting addicted,
please. '
this came to me bcos of my very own dad.
for i duno how mmaaaaaaannnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyy years...
i've been asking him to quit smoking!!!
BUT of course he didnt.
CNY went out to 拜年 tgt.
in each one house we visited, he could smoke 5 sticks.
imagine how many houses & how many cigarettes he would've smoked?!
DADDY CAN YOU PLEASE, IN ANYWAY, STOP SMOKING!!!!!!!!!!!!
but wat can i do?
talking. pleading, scolding, stealing his whole box of
cigarettes - no use.
he still manages to take them back& smoke as much as he pleases when i'm not there.
i cant possibly tear up all of them lyk i did with my grandpa
when i was little.
its a waste of money, waste of effort, stains ur fingers red,
& they jus buy a new box and continue smoking.
for th very first time, i got angry at my dad.
stole & kept his cigarettes several times, he took them back.
aft lyk 3times, he said 'dont play rdy lah'.
dont play?
you said dont play?
YOU THINK I'M PLAYING?!
do you know how much i wish that you would stop smoking that f-ed up thing?!
do you noe i was trying hard to supress my anger, tears & not let it show?!
why be so dumb to try smoking & risk so much in getting addicted?!
(not to offend anyone, sorry if i did.)
smoking has so f many negative effects to smokers non-smokers
strangers friends family urownkids yourbody thenvironment.
dont nd me to list all, every single being on earth that's able to think
knows all th bads that's related to smoking.
who can tell me th advantages of smoking, if there's any?
watever lah. smokers cant quit just as they sae so.
we cant do anything to make smokers stop it either.
if they themselves dont have th will to quit it,
f nothing in th whole world can stop them.

beetle!

2010-02-19T23:05:00.004+08:00

A TINY WINNY(LITERALLY) LITTLE BLACK BEETLE,
HID IN MY CLOTHES, & BIT MY FLESH!
OUCH!

met up with teena & charmaine!
icecream~~~ been craving so long!
hazelnut & passionfruit sorbet, yummy~(:
first chem & chi lesson in sch tdae.
chinese class- one malay?(my fren says he's indian-chi), one indian!
they both got B3 fr O'level chinnese! omg!!!
i couldnt believe it at first!
but they could rly speak & write chinese!
k that's called pro.
& i considering to take A'level chinese this year,a teacher said it'll b a jump.
well, doesnt matter if uu take this year or th next,
you cant retake once you passed.
so its beter to take it first year when th workload isnt as heavy compared to
year2 rite?

nth much to say tdae, except that i'm broke.
& hellokitty has a mouth omg!

WHAT?!

2010-02-18T23:11:00.004+08:00

there's a campaign needed?! wth?!
they didnt sae so at th beginnig!
is it true?!
i tot MI so good join SC dun nd do wat stupd campaign de siahh!
wat siahh.
make ppl noe more bout you n vote fr uu to see whether anot uu can join sc?!
first th hundred words, next th interview, now campaign? serious?!
ugh creep lahh!!
wth siah. if rly nd then..... Geee!!!!!
tmr first chinese lesson, gotta consult tchr on whether i shud take chi A'level this year.
lessons jus started, still books not bought n sort.
so we're stl kinda free.
better grab th freaking last relaxing chance & free time to go out with frens, slack &
do some major shopping before we're trapped with suffocating loads of hmwk!
i miss going out with frens!
met husi at lot1 for longjohn ytd.
hah she suddenly craved for it.(:
& met siewling(my cousin(: ) there too!, she wasnt used to seeing me in MI uni, haha.
so i've been eating during breaks these 2 / 3weeks.
so unusual... i actually wanted to eat when i felt hungry!
i want 减肥 lahh!
restrain me from food please!
good that its book buying time, tight cash flow rdy!
no more food for me! :D
been sleeping at my newhouse, getting more & more used to it.
feeilng it more like my home now.(:
wanted th house keys cos i wnna kp all my MI stuff here.
but they didnt wn to givb me keys.
limited.):
i want to sleep early!
but tdae, there was only one math exercise fr hmwk,
i only finished it at around 10+pm.
started at arnd 7 !
but i went to eat, walk around, came to new house, bathed,
so delayed, plus watched tv.
but now only one simple hmwk i alrdy completed so late at night.
whn th work gets more n cca commences.
does it mean i'm gonna slp even later than i am now?
TIME MANAGEMENT NEEDED!!!
lyk tt i'll fall aslp in class siah!
i cant seat at one position listening to someone talk v long whn i'm sleepy siah.
now's 23:31.
better hurry up n go slp or else i'll b sleepy in class again!
tmr first chem lesson! yeah!
& 10s2's house is - Sapphire!
though i still think Zircon's yellow is bright & nice,
Sapphire's blue! good enough.(:

looking at your eyes..
so stressed up?..
but something's coming up isnt it?..
smile a lil will ya?..
well its been long...
still calling myself dumb for that...
chances anymore?
yeah gotta admit, desires r hard to supress..
especially for those who's determination isnt that strong yet...
guess i'm one of them..

& hey man, dont misunderstand, i wasn't looking at you.

TO MALCOLM;
hey, dont think so much rdy ok!
rmb wat i said also!
MAGNETON alwaes here k!

th start

2010-02-17T23:01:00.005+08:00

first day of lessons!
new classmates n teachers.
seriously MrSengu's english is damn hard to catch!
tdae's math lesson was lyk amath lesson back in secondary :D
But things' gonna get harder n harder v soon!
tmr PE lesson.. walao 2 period per week.
will it b as bad as i'm expecting it to be?...
lyk need run alot lehh... ugh.):

cca result came out.
i got student council!
all those in our clique that opted for sc got it!
so we're all gonna b SCs tgt!
provided we get tru th interview.
yeah, we have to go for an interview first.
lol initially tot dun nd.
so troublesome lahh!
alrdy wrote n handed in that few hundred words for that signup form.
now stl interview!
seriously this isnt something that i would've possibly go for in th past!
wat a change. time to make impacts!
*whatever that comes along, i will accept it.

& I MISS ORIENTATION!

i'm staring at you wherever you go.
dont look back at me, it wont b good.
this desire that shouldn't be there.
dont you try'da make me lose my heart.

its a day.

2010-02-16T01:53:00.003+08:00

*记忆会跟着糊掉...

默默看着今夜天空星光闪烁
看今夜的流星滑过了天竟笑我的心
我不愿去相信我们之间隔着海洋的距离
我的爱已溶化在空气里...

how would i noe why..
it jus comes n goes...
just like th rain.
when th clouds r heavy, water just come pouring down...
when th clouds r light n white,
no matter how hard uu squeeze nothing drips out,
& th sunshine's there.
rain's rain. sunshine's sunshine.

that figure that lingers in my mind...
teaching me lessons of wat i wnna noe...
teaching me to be self-conscious...
prepared in advance...
b quicker for spontaneous reactions.
stop doubting wat was done.
stop thrashing senarios that you noe wont ever happen in real life.
stop going about it or wat could've been done over an overdued episode.
you want others to noe, first let urself noe.

as th going says,
you never try, you'll never know.
; everything that occured,
every episode that you have met,
explains many things that you havent known,
or would then realise, in near future.
without firsthand experience is just lyk
being a little puppy in a big city street.
knowing nothing, plain hearsay;
vulnerable, prone to cons n hurts.

mayb having something to linger n ponder upon,
isnt a bad thing..
it gives you th drive for ur discipline,
in doing something that you need,
keeping urself on th right track,
dont get distracted,
dont get attracted,
to obtain th result that you want.
it, might, as well, act lyk ur goal..
in order to get it alot must b done.

* i'm running dry...
draining my emotions..
occupying parts of my mind & heart...
feelings of regret.. 可惜..
dumbness... woodness.. 木头人..
wat dumb nearmiss.

CNY !

2010-02-15T01:54:00.002+08:00

its CNY ! angbaos rolling in~
house visits, new clothes!
cash -- not fr me to keep. aww.
mama gonna out them in bank.

k let me shout this out ;
" wat th fuck's with you?! finding fault with me?!!!!
creeps you. !!! "

thankyou.

so. ugh.
beer - all of a sudden, tastes sweet to me.
didnt drink much, in control(:
but is that little bit of alcohol th cause of th slight headaches?...
oh well... once in a long while...

我好累...
can i not get bothered by anything?...
can i gopple down a can of beer now?...
that's a problem with a raging increase in influence.
while this, its a sea at tides. high tide low tide.
drag me awae n drown me in you again, why not.
now have i gone too high up th shore that even th high tides aren't enough fr me?
occasionally feeling th cold touches of th sea.
little yet chills ur spine.
through ur heart.
jus hope to build a dam across it.
but where're th bricks n time fr construction?
who would be th manager to lead th start?

& fr that, shutting that little door of mine.
seems powerless, overwhelmed.
that amazingly strong attraction of a being,
every now n then barging in.
lay down ur guard fr a sec n ur down with it.
as th interactions gets by, would i be able to manage?
it seems lyk banging ur head tru a glass window that you know's alrdy there.
lock up all loose ends, seal up all gaps, would that work?
well lets hope so.

i noe i'm crapping, i'm tired sleepy with some sorta headache n a not very nice mood n
some things that lingers in my mind.
& crap i think if i stay up a little too long more i'm gonna collapse.
geez is it rly alcohol or am i rly exhausted.

*splitting confusion & headaches. awkard guiltiness & forces of attraction.
= a whole lot to handle.

Happy Chinese New Year!

2010-02-14T02:38:00.012+08:00

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
@ my new house overnight again~ 爽
ltr go 拜年, finally can wear my new clothes~~~♥

MI;
class & combi finally out!
i got my first choice!
H2chem, phy, math H1hist.
class: 10S2 !
i wonder who would b my classmates!
hopefully gonna noe our ccas on wed!
or could it alrdy been displayed on th web?
better check later.
burned peanut fr that science experiment too!
aha funny.

went back to WESTSPRING on friday~
finally met old guys~ (sec frens& peeps, not saying u guys old uhh!)
bought new clothes again!
wahaha extravagant.
i want my contact lenses. guess i wont b able to wear them fr cny liao...
duno when dn i can go take.
& y are coloured lenses disallowed in sch?
wat does it affect bout studies anywae?!

grumbling~;

is it ok to cry on th first dae of a new year?
it doesnt rly matter luh.
emo-ness suddenly came to me, wth.
its a very general question, y does things change?..
it could be soooo darn good whn it first started...
but y does it die off...
heard a song jus now.. 何必在一起..
these 5words itself gave me alot to think...

since you noe its gonna be bad, y want it ?
since you noe its gonna end, y still ?
since its became this way, y hang on ?
since you noe ur not gonna start it, y bother ?
since you dont even want it to start, y think so much ?
since th other party's seemingly neutrality is making you frustrated,
y think of it ?
since you can try putting that outta ur mind, y not ?
since you noe its gonna be hard, thn work harder !
since you dont wanna let it be, thn dont let it start!
its roaming in every now n then, thn keep crossing it out !
push it away! keep it at bay!
if one day its inevitable fr it to get close, thn shut th door tight!
if one day, you really cant control, i've got nothin else to say.

was it mere coincidence or wat was it.
missed that stop, & i met that.
scoldable, then cheeky fate.
brushed by like thrice?
its was like ur on stamps!
pondered over that even after its over.
wats wrong? thats wrong.
thats all wrong.
wat do i want.
so th best wae is to avoid.
so wat if i didnt respond th way i shud?
wouldnt my actual respond to that that day,
benefit more for wat i intend?
since i dont want that to happen so i might as well not get bothered.
even if i bothered, that wouldnt b wat's th idea that's there.
even though those eyes seem to say something,
i choose not to read them, not to think.
th crucial years, focus, concentration.
that'd be gone after a year anyway.
endure tru that year n it'll b free.
shut it up & keep crossing out,
that's th way you do it.

i guess you might understand or have some clue about it if you ever read this?
是这样就是这样，不是就不是。
done, shutup.

♥DREAMS

2010-02-09T23:54:00.004+08:00

I ♥ DREAMS!
bcos in dreams there are no restrictions;
anything & everything can happen in there!
that's where all hell breaks loose
& uu can have fun till watever shit happens &
you wont get caught(:

♥
♥

DREAMY~~

& HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LONGY!!
(lesterleong; oldman likes oldies ^-^ ♥)

ponpon

2010-02-09T16:40:00.004+08:00

pon-ed tht chinese lecture tdae..
uhh cnt b bad student lahh.
no more pon-ing anything anymore!
felt bad. wont get caught de rite?
went off with yuanting n ruifen at around 2+ ? while others arnd 4+.
didnt noe wat to do so went lot1, fr awhile dn went home..
on th mrt, saw yangcong (weechong)..
he alighted at yewtee - go gay at fren house.(:
he wanted to go toastbox thn offered to treat me a drink.
so i went home with a cup of aloevera~
hah thanks uh(:
since i wokeup till now, i ate 1tuna puff, 1hotdog bun ( extra mustard(: ), 1pac of 鸡扒,
1bottle of fujiapple spark & 1aloevera drink.
fr me thats eating alot le lehh...
tmr dun wn eat lunch liao...
绝食tgt with yanqi! lol.
this few daes kp wn eat, wats wrong with me.
feel lyk sleeping again-.-
TODAY'S GP PAPER DIDNT HAVE COCKROACH! YEAH!!!
BUT. its was kinda boring tdae, so..
i guess having cockraches as a subject discussion MIGHT b more interesting.
+ i screamed during Math lecture BCOS OF THAT SAME RUBBER COCKROACH AGAIN!!!!!
wth. dumb roach! i wnna call yuanting kazua frm now on.

I WANNA NOE MY CCA, SUB COMBI & CLASS LAHH!!
nd wait till when . geez.
but next wed start actual proper class lessons .
AHH!!!! studytime. ;)

& Chahaya is one scary girl! ;)

no more roaches please~

2010-02-08T19:22:00.009+08:00

geez tht vid cnt watch uhh.
i want convert file, someone tell me where can convert?

school ended relatively early tdae(:
compared to previous weeks.
but th sun was scorching, made me sweat.
GP, hist, eng(?) lectures & tutorial.
they made new th subs seem scary.
but wat new thing doesnt seem scary at th beginning?
dont fret dont fret. jus study. so much essay lahh...

& wats with cockroaches tdae lah.
first thing in th morning walked to mrt station,
a halfway flat roach lied on th floor, heng i saw it n didnt step.
thn during GP lecture, yuanting scared me with a fake roach!!
its alrdy v intimidating jus by glancing at it can.
& then, cockroaches as a case study for GP.
on th bus Nithiya told me, she went fr GP tutorial tdae;
' how to kill roaches ' -->
- one leg on th back of it, one on th feelers , *PULL*
- pluck out all its legs.
- smash it with a shoe
- (by someone alrdy disgusted by th topic) can just use pesticides right?!
wtf lahh cant choose a less disgusting thing uhh.
tmr's my turn fr GP tutorial lehh!!!

so sleepy once i reached home today..
fell aslp on th sofa aft watching th tv fr awhile.
sswwwweeeaaattttt~~~~
cnt tk it luh.
was talking bout this at th busstop jus now
with yanqi & yuanting, can s'pore snow a little??
it'll b so nice .
& i'm missing something that i hvb rly no idea wat it is.
its just something there...

** Congratulations to Malcolm for being so lucky today!
avoided a pot tht almost crashed into his head
& missed that bus tht got into an accident.
how lucky uu r todae!
for that he's gonna be a good Samaritan & givb me something valuable!
Right malcolm~~ ^^

Malcolm's dedication to Magneton♥
http://destiny-ofrunning-emotions.blogspot.com/2010_02_01_archive.html

♥ :D

2010-02-07T19:11:00.005+08:00

obviously its th MI DANCE♥

some parts r cut-ted & its slanted.

sad uhh. but still viewable rite, so enjoy(:

i love th music~

& are there any ways to rotate a video & tell me if there's probs viewing it.(:

its a gather;

2010-02-07T01:11:00.003+08:00

reunion dinner ~
todae & tommorrow's reunion dae, lol.
diff group of ppl of cos.
@my new house(:
so i'm currently using th internet on th new bed
in my new bedroom of my newhouse
in th middle of th night , which means its sleepover!/overnight!
great that its saturday.
grabbed a big bag load of stuff here.
of cos, blanket included, cant slp without it(:
i'm sleepy but overjoyed that i can connect to th wireless here!! its a FINALLY!!!
so i'm using till i 爽.
i've been missing school (Millennia Institute♥)
but travelling's no fun luh.

grumble time;
keep ur heart crossed!
just say NO! to ur thoughts everytime that pops up!
shake ur head, rub ur nose, bang ur head. watever.
pulling tru it needs hard work.
its just for 3years.(:

ugh! its a loadsa crapp!
crapp thats attention grabbing,
mood controlling,
yeah why do i even bother?!
watever watever watever its got nth to do with me!
its fking non of my business!
ugh wat a crapp.
crossed out thrown away burnt.
get lost of my sight! creep!
actually its nothin' isnt it?(:

keep your heart crossed ! *x*

♥ i love MI ♥

2010-02-05T21:52:00.009+08:00

i'm finally back online!
dumb connections lahhhhhh.

its th last day of orientation! aww how sad..):
gotta start stressing over studies liao...
uhh.....):
wonder how it would b.
7 daes of orientation.
fun n relaxed, made me love MI from th very first day,
there's some kinda warmth..(:
finished choosing subjects n cca.
guess wat i chose, student councillor.
被说服了啦
how unlike me. hopefully it will b my motivation to stop
procrastination & consistency in my studies.

lets summarise orientation experience ;
Tachibana4♥ (i cnt find th group on fb lehh)
very creative 'cheer instructor'
nice peeps all around.(:
ogl syakirah's reminder smses.(:
i love th music early in th morning~
no more nice loud music to listen in th morning aft orientation liao...): (hohh?)
only 'coldplay' - viva lavita (?) , played by MI AKE (angklung kulingtang ensemble)
like 3min timer to assembly starts.
bunch of talks, causes drowsiness.
games n cheers, wakes us up.(:
cca day- performances~
jap students (okinawa) came,
performed trad jap dance - very very well practiced, damn insync.
compared to MI dancers... can see japanese rly v serious in their stuff.
then, cca booths.
yah yah kena shuifu to join sc..
NEc & Sc da dui tai uhh so cute.
modern dance second choice, shud i join two ccas?
(only if i rly get into sc. bt ogl yongjia sae cfm in, serious uhh, sae sc untl lyk v scary lehh)
thn thn thn... thn... got wat uhh.
ok, tdae last dae- finale.
each grp needed 3cheers, 1performance & one mascot.
Our Mascot was, IAN ! (noe him rite~)
he was turned into a Geisha~ with big boobs.
photo update next tym.
thn.........
Best of All ;
th MI DANCE♥♥♥
y like so many ppl dun like uhh?
so fun~^^
but, girls n guys had to mix around.
but bcos of th mixing, i came to know a girl i didnt know, which was my primary schoolmate..(:
she was th only one that i asked bout pri sch , n so qiao she also unity(:
sad she sae she appealing for poly, duno how th result.
try'da put th MI dance vid here.(:
is it copyrighted? danced by ogls lehh. they wont mind bahh?
anywae, 4 sessions of MI dance, i'm lucky engh to only kena guy one time(:
nice music, once th music's down, makes me wnna dance(:
orientation ended of with MI DANCE♥
wat more can i ask for~♥

starting from mondae - 08feb10 - trial lectures?
k lectures starts. noe results for sub combi???
better dont givb me my second choice!!!
1st - (H2; chem, phys, math. H1; hist or art)
2nd - (H2; chem, math, ECONS?! H1; bio or hist)
think i'm not gonna tk psychology diploma le...):
no guarantee in getting that cert.
If my A'level result not good, even if i pass th course also cnt get cert.
might as well jus concentrate on A'levels right?
i'm gonna miss relaxing. missing sleep alrdy.
i'll 趁机slp more during cny!
looking forward to ccas.
i stl wnna dance!

aft this ends... i'm gonna shut that freakin door.
locking it up till A'levels is done.
& i'm shutting you out!
(: wish me good luck! -.-

XXX heart crossed! XXX

Wrecked.

2010-01-28T18:19:00.011+08:00

i feel lyk letting go of that someone i've been trying so hard to hang onto.
its so damn hard. i feel tired.
its like i'm trying to b like th way we were.
but. he's been giving me a feeling.
a stronger n stronger feeling. that he doesnt want me anymore.
that he doesnt want to care about me anymore.
like i no longer mean a thing to him anymore.
like he's already given up.
like he's throwing it away.
th wae he makes me feel. makes me feel that i really shud give up.
like why do i hang on , to a relationship so wrecked.
& hurt myself so much.
its starting to make me think that,
giving him up, dumping him, pulling him out of my life,
& liking someone else, would b so much easier.
its all changed. everything's changed.
never gonna get back to th same way as it was before.
too much destructions have been done.
too much holes to b mended.
fuck it.
what now.
WHAT?!!!!!
fuck you freaking assohle!
its like you fucking dont care anymore!
if you really dont care anymore then y not jus throw me away no matter wat i said,
or how hurt i'll feel!
even by not throwing me away, its freaking th same amount of hurt!
what th hack do you want now?!
your actions are seriously showing me a redlight!
it Was like you were giving me a chance.
giving me hope that something could still be done!
but your attitude towards me, your smses.
some gave me hope, that its improving, that you're still mine.
some, utterly, pushing me away from you.
closer to th cliff.
our relationship has been like an avalanche.
it felt strong, like solid snow.
but one wrong step, we were falling down .
falling further n further
from that summit where we shud b happily together.
drifting apart as th avalanche got bigger, stronger.
like our problems brought us far away.
is there no more turning back?
is there no more hope of having your love like i did before?
is there no more hope for happiness?..
is th journey only left with pain , like th injuries you'll get from a real avalanche.
down till th end of th mountain...
till th end.. back to square one.
where we were just friends.
or. strangers.
even if things really end... badly...
i still wnna be frens...
injuries, those pain, can b healed.
even if there were scars, they would be memories...
lessons learnt.
i wont regret.

可是看着你，我真的觉得好痛...

*above is a full post. try reading if you want.

MI ; First Day!

2010-01-28T17:19:00.011+08:00

Orientation~~
27jan10, sch posting results out.
today, 28jan10. SCHOOL STARTS.
wth y start so fast one?!!! suddenly siahh...
we hvnt even adapted to sleeping early & waking up before sunrise!!

Fine.
first day of school.
wokeup, saw stars. thats how early.
went phoenix fr bus, in westspring uni!
so long no wear. & in same train with current ws-ers.
abit weird.
In MI, total 8 westsprings(including me). that's all i saw.
grouped by areas we lived in..
my group, TachiBana4.
ok school mates..
definitely jokers around..
teachers seem fine, for now.
nice OGLs.. , they're SCs.
they can b v high .
lunch----- supply of Milo & sandwhich.
after orientation, went around school, talk to teachers...
nice place...
Overall; not bad experience.(:
but i still dont like principal speeches.
though th hall got aircon.(: sit till butt pain-.-

tmr same, then end at 6pm!
tired lahh.
now i must treasure every moment of sleep ._.
getting that $30 orientation package tmr.
gonna get badge.(:
then settle sub choices...
diploma course...
cca......
then jiu...... busybusybusy.. studystudystudy...(?)
no more relaxin le lahh.
A'level + Diploma = chiong liao.

my thumb's still hurting from that bump on sunday!!
how hard was it anywae?! i dont even know how i hurt it!!

gaga, i'll try'da rmb th pics (:

i'm going MI !!

2010-01-27T12:43:00.002+08:00

couldnt connect to th internet last night, th whole night.
stupid wireless, when would he ask someone to do it or something?!
i've done as th singtel ppl said, did trial& errors to get a freaking wireless connection,
still, NO OWN WIRELESS!!!!
how many Years do i have to wait?!!!

Anywae, yeah i'm in MI alright!!!^^
who else's going there???
anyone else from westspring going there??!!
now i only knnow Two person going.
& report 730am, y so early lahh...
gotta get ready for new school !!!

43 things a girl wishes her bf knows..

2010-01-26T01:31:00.008+08:00

Really, what Everygirl wants...

out with Kahling..(:

2010-01-26T00:20:00.004+08:00

today, woke up, hands pain daooooooooo~~~
like they were gonna break..
turning that door knob made my hand feel lyk my muscles were tearing!
ytd play awhile only jiu lyk that. tsk.
now i cant exert too much force to my right hand...

went out, Kahling LATE, (as usual lahh..hah)
initially wanted to meet Inside bus190.
but then, ... . went fareast in seperate buses.
(after seeing almost 10 190buses go by.. she finally reached!!!)
so went eat.. then SLICE!
own mixed..(: ( Matcha ice x1, blueberry puree x2, strawberry cubes x1, aloevera cubes x2)
not bad..(:
started shopping..
kahling wanted that venim jacket we saw that other day.
but ended up buying a dirtygreen biker jack. lol
shopped v long, i only bought one eyeliner._.
went taka find puma,
then dumb nvr go back fareast,
walked until somerset jus to get that bus .
walk so far. -.-

thanks Kahling fr th talkings & ur post..(:
http://neo-lingahling.blogspot.com/2010/01/fep.html
yeah work hard to it..
uhhh... really must help lahhhhhhh...
dumbdumbdumb.
realise i kp saying this word this few days.(:

y do i alwaes feel tired once it reaches around 7/8pm when i'm outside?

...

2010-01-25T23:31:00.007+08:00

can you not treat me this way?...
can you please dont talk to me like i irritated you again?...
you're giving me a chance now right?...
in this case can you not be like this?...
these attitudes from you really crushes my morale...
it really hurts me...
dont you know that a little word from you that may seem like a nothing, can mean everything to me...
unknowingly, your words can hurt me...
are you just still feeling down or is it something about me?...
i need your help too...
i wanna work hard...
but can you have a better mood?...
cheer up a little?...
give me hope...
give me that 推动力that i need so much?...
is that too much to ask?...
...

ok i'll stop doing that...
i'll stop saying those kinda things...
i'll stop being a weakling...
i'll stop being a qian jing xiao jie...
i'll be the independent girl that you want.
...

is that really th only way to make things work?...
why do i feel that it's so hard?...
when other people can do it so easily...

)':

2010-01-25T01:36:00.009+08:00

feeling so empty...
feeling so incomplete without you by my side...
i want you here with me...
i need you by my side...
the closeness we used to have, even before we were officially together...
i missed you so...
finally see you again...
how i missed that view of you...
felt like someone was twisting my heart around...
why did i let it turn this way...
how could i...
Stupid Fool...
i hate myself for hurting you...
what a Fcking dumbass i am...
i really am..
How Many Times do i need to realise...
How Many Times do i need to know...
WHEN would i ever get it right...,,
i know turning back time and doing things all over again
is a dream many of us humans wants...
I DO TOO...
if only we could really start all over again...
what would be of us...
what promises could i make to you...
its getting so hard to breathe...
As If crying could be of any help...
That Bond♥ wouldnt just come back like that...
you cant just turn things around with a flick of your finger...
i'm hating it...
it is all so hurting...
can i Ever do it right...
would i ever...)':

after a day; shopping

2010-01-24T21:48:00.009+08:00

today, first thing, met for breakfast at yewtee mccafe♥..(:
Malcolm Tai was 30min late!
didnt have appetite, almost couldnt even finish one hashbrown.
not too long later, went off to tk mrt.
lotsa police taking th same train, stood so orderly(: not bad.

First stop, Bugis.
Bugis Junction; searched for toilet.
on th wae, heard wondersgirls 'nobody' th slow version..(:
it was from this.. sweet shop?
went in to listen that song..^^
then teena bought a packet of sour candy. hah.
continued walking, go th jap bookstore, teena went cinema thn kp want watch that '17blades'?
bcos wuchun's actting in it, lol.
thn bugis street~ went second floor straight, bought 3 pieces of clothing(:
one was $29! ;
didnt buy clothes at 20+ with my own money bfr, so pondered fr some time.
thn Alester spon me $10, jiu buy lohh..^^
thanks so much! wahaha~
then.. yah th other two bought top at that same shop me&kahling bought 3tops tgt in 30min th last time.
thn went iluma, StarFactory- ddr, japdrum, basketball machine. --> A GREAT WORKOUT!
that bb machine, 真要了我手的命!

Next stop, Suntec ;
walked from bugis, quite near orh.
went toastbox fr lunch, where LesterLeong's (longy)working.
candid picture taken~ haha
how shocked his face looked like when he saw us, lol.
still no appetite, picked food from each of them.. done(:
laksa n meesiam made by longy rite? not bad.(:
took a ride on 'Mini Rider2' in suntec with teena.
$6. not bad but downfall parts not high enough.
went StarFactory again..
oh on th way, Malcolm picked up $15 from th floor.
wasnt dropped by any of us, so,
$15 for us to spend on games^^
changed them to tokens,
played 'time catcher' & 'house of dead 4'. fun.
& haus of dead4 was even fun to just look, nice visuals, th guys played well too.
they tried th pull-type-hook toy catcher machine (?). couldnt catch any, too bad.
almost 630pm (lester end work)
went down..
attention caught by a metal plating coin machine(?i forgot.)
alester wanted it, needed $1 coins, 3times with no luck fr changing th $10note,
in th end jus got $2 fr one , & it was th wrong design.
thn went off again, teena wanted to go crystal jade to get cake.
but went to meet lester first.
toastbox- free milo fr us! th boss wasnt there, hah.
thn gave lester his b'dae present frm us- 宅男 black.T (:
& sang b'dae song..
continued walking, go secret recipe for cake, & to get alester's b'dae present.
Alester kept refusing.
Ahma called, nagged, ask me call home early.
( tsk, can she stop it? who go out will wn go home early one. *abit unreasonable also.): )
in th end nvr buy, teena go lot1 dn buy..
bcos i cnt stay long, we quickly went mrt, thn home.
(Ahma showed me black face once i rchd home. Mummy also didnt sae anytin! issh!)
that's about it.
& thank guys fr consistently helping us to carry our stuffs th whole day.(:

tmr meet kahling at 1230 = more sleep~(:
thigh & legs muscles suann...
pictures another day..
didnt hvb time to go gallery tdae...
sad-ed.
tired le lahhhhhhh..........

time to shake off those fats!!!
sleeping early tdae, most prob.

* i'm a dumbass...)':

need more sleep )':

2010-01-24T09:00:00.003+08:00

I NEED TO START PRACTICING SLEEPING EARLY BEFORE SCHOOL STARTS!!!
or i'll have to sleep later than 3am everynight... =.=

Exploring~

2010-01-24T02:02:00.003+08:00

Time to post~
explored many things linked with blogging..
was fun.. But,
this PLURK, why was it so confusing?
had to ask other ppl how to get that box on my blog,
n took th longest time figuring out how it works.
it updates slow too.
Is that it or is it just me?

Later out with
Teena, Malcolm n Alester(he better!!)..(:
Monday out with Kahling..(:
SHOPPING SHOPPING SHOPPING~~
i wnna buy lotsa clothes!
chinese new year's coming~^^
gotta clear my wardrobe on tuesdae.
(she'll finally stop nagging)

School Posting results out on Wednesday!
i shud b getting into Millenia Institute right?
1st choice.
i wonder who else's going there.
i dont wnna go there alone on th first dae!!
HEADACHES:

which sub combi? physics or bio. but i cant take bio..)':
ccas; symphonic band or modern dance. uneasy with both.
A'level + Diploma? is there rly gonna b psycology diploma courses? i wnna take that! but can i cope? need consultation.
which was th route i said i wnna take to MI? mrt to bukitbatok, take bus66 to arnd MI ?

i need to excercise! am i rly getting fat?

Th First Time! MyFrens(:

2010-01-23T16:45:00.000+08:00

Hi All♥!

This is my first time attempting a blog, you guys shud noe(:
Well, i've alwaes felt blogging was time consuming,
n i'd b too lazy to keep it maintained.
But seeing all of you blogging,
i've decided to givb it a Try(:
Another reason's that, there seem to be lesser things to do on
th web to keep myself entertained.
So, guess keeping a blog's no harm rite?(:

Mayb i might just spill everything out here,
no more keeping emotions to myself,
or repeating things to diff ppl at diff times..
i'll have a place to do my complainings as well(:
isnt that bad afterall.

Anywae, NEWCOMMER HERE!
feel free to givb me some tips bout this(:
guys, help me with this~~!!
i dont think i would keep this a secret for long.
let's just see.
Done with This Post!

Ps: feeling a little weird bout this.
& stupid i duno wat did i press, made me retype this.
bye!